Hi there. Ey.
"And I need it now, so Jen and I can drive back to Las Vegas for a dirty weekend without Angie finding out"Originally Posted by cassiesmom
"Ah forget that skinny little twerp' said Elyse 'Jens not good enough for you Brad Honey. Take me with you for the dirty weekend."
"NO !!!!' Yelled Bonny 'Take me Brad, I'm dirtier than Elyse, I've got stinky socks to prove it."
"Nope, he'll take me to Vegas' said Helen 'I'm dirtier than..............
Mud wrestling
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Stayin' In Control
gulp..."I'd rather be mud wrestling with a bunch of Sumo wrestlers than eat that mushroom concoction Bonnie made...says GrandChester.
"Oh Bradley, I know its hard to choose which stinky woman is best for the dirty romantic weekend" says Helen with a sigh. Take my word for it, I have not bathed since the airport fiasco a good 3 weeks ago. Gotta say I am the raunchiest one.. brags Helen.
And the drunkest!! laughs Bonnie.
The heat is on
Hi there. Ey.
"RIGHT !!!! The heat is on now, you lot." Yelled Wom. "I''ll have you all know that I am the drunkest SOB (Son ofa Bragger) here. And I can prove it !!! Once I had a drinking binge with Bonnie, and I drank her under the table. Yep, there she was, flat out on the floor under the table, covered in peanut shells and other sundry detritus from upturned ashtrays. I felt kind of sorry for her, so I threw the tablecloth over her so she could sleep it off. When I returned in the morning, Bonnie was................"
Raw eggs, vodka and ketchup cocktail
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Stayin' In Control
...back up at the bar sitting next to what looked like a monkey, mixing up her raw eggs, vodka and ketchup cocktail.
In walks Bill..."Good Morning...Is breakfast ready Bonnie"?
Bill looked closer at the monkey..." Oops, that must be the bartender from last night"
"Tis not, Bill...meet Bradley/Bradford Pear Pitt! Thats my cute pet name for him". Bonnie slurps on her cocktail then says "Pull up a stool Bill. We have a bit of a dilemma. Last night Wom.......
bail bondsman
Registered User
got his butt into big trouble. He was trying to talk Bradley/Bradford Peat Pitt into free drinks around the bar. Bradley/Bradford Pear Pitt refused, so Wom threw him out the door into the parking lot. The Park Ranger showed up & darted Wom & hauled him off in one of those bear trap cages. He is now in the jug & the bail bondsman has set his bond at a million bucks. Now what .......
jail break
Stayin' In Control
got his butt into big trouble. He was trying to talk Bradley/Bradford Peat Pitt into free drinks around the bar. Bradley/Bradford Pear Pitt refused, so Wom threw him out the door into the parking lot. The Park Ranger showed up & darted Wom & hauled him off in one of those bear trap cages. He is now in the jug & the bail bondsman has set his bond at a million bucks. Now what .......
jail break
"Now what to do? Plan a jail break I guess?! We certainly cant let Wom sitting in the joint"!
Bradley/Bradford Pear Pitt speaks up.." I certainly have the money to bail him out. Oh no wait...Angie wants to adopt another child. Jail break it is!!
" I can turn on the charm over at the jail and claim we are filming Oceans 14 here. Ill get the keys from the guard saying we need these for props.
Bonny Ill toss you the keys.....Helen you can drive the getaway mo-ped its up and running again! Cassiesmom you....
shrimp on the bar-b
Hi there. Ey.
.......can throw a shrimp on the bar-b for Wom, and put some beer on ice for him to. You know Wom is such a fantastic great guy, we have to look out for him and treat him in the manner of which he is accustomed to."
"Now what to do? Plan a jail break I guess?! We certainly cant let Wom sitting in the joint"!
Bradley/Bradford Pear Pitt speaks up.." I certainly have the money to bail him out. Oh no wait...Angie wants to adopt another child. Jail break it is!!
" I can turn on the charm over at the jail and claim we are filming Oceans 14 here. Ill get the keys from the guard saying we need these for props.
Bonny Ill toss you the keys.....Helen you can drive the getaway mo-ped its up and running again! Cassiesmom you....
Just then, there was a loud explosion, and Wom came staggering out of a gaping hole in the wall.
"Quick, into the moped everyone" Yelled Grand Chester.
And off they sped down the road.
"What on earth happened ?" Said Elyse "I had a beer in one hand, and a shrimp in the other, and all of a sudden it was like all noise and fireworks."
"I think I know what happened" Said Wom. "Bill took his still over to the water tap to put some water in it, and you know what happens when fresh water is mixed with battery acid and whatever else he tries to cook up in that still. Anyway, did anyone manage to save my shrimp ??"
"Oh my God' said Elyse 'talking about shrimp.....where's Bonny ???"
"Who cares ?' Said Wom. 'Shrimp, shrimp, I want shrimp, where's my shrimp"
Moped U turn
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