Hold your horses everyone! says Bill. I just spoke to head of security. The airport staff loves Shirley the cat and cant stand to see her go. They have agreed to drop any charges. They have also properly packed Woms Jawed Beast on ice. Hes on his way to the National Museum Of Fish!
I guess I am going to have to put my foot down! Bill said.
"With a show of hands...who wants to see Celene Dion and the Elvis Impersonator in Vegas?
Ok... its unanimous...Viva Las Vegas!
GrandChester runs over with train tickets in hand.
Whats this? asks Wom.
Tickets to board the Chattanooga ChooChoo! laughs GrandChester
Well blow me down! Does this mean what I think it means? asks Koko excitedly
"Relax.' said Wom 'I've just heard that the Chattanooga Choo Choo has been grounded due to greenhouse gas and global warming concerns. The only way we can reverse that is to go to Al Gore's house nextdoor to Graceland, and plead our case with him."
"So who will be our spokesperson?" Said Bonny.
"I will' said Grand Chester 'I know all about science and gasses and chemicals and stuff. Why, it was only yesterday that I was cleaning my kitchen sink with a chemical."
"Bill !!!' Said Elyse "Would you stop crying ?? We'll eventually get to Las Vegas. Would someone give him some tissues ?? I can't stand his blubbering."
"Booooooohoooooohooooo...'wailed Bill 'I wanna see Celine, I wanna see Celine, sob sob."
"Well, we'll just have to think of something else" Said Wom.
"Relax.' said Wom 'I've just heard that the Chattanooga Choo Choo has been grounded due to greenhouse gas and global warming concerns. The only way we can reverse that is to go to Al Gore's house nextdoor to Graceland, and plead our case with him."
"So who will be our spokesperson?" Said Bonny.
"I will' said Grand Chester 'I know all about science and gasses and chemicals and stuff. Why, it was only yesterday that I was cleaning my kitchen sink with a chemical."
"Bill !!!' Said Elyse "Would you stop crying ?? We'll eventually get to Las Vegas. Would someone give him some tissues ?? I can't stand his blubbering."
"Booooooohoooooohooooo...'wailed Bill 'I wanna see Celine, I wanna see Celine, sob sob."
"Well, we'll just have to think of something else" Said Wom.
Bicycle Store
" Bill you are such a big cry baby" Says Bonnie. "There's a Bicycle Store I saw up the street." Said Alyse. "Why don't we head up there & buy a couple of bikes & helmets & bike to Graceland!" They have tricycles for the inexperienced, dirt bikes for the sporty, mountain bikes for the challenged, & tandem bikes for lazy chickens. "That sounds like a good idea says Bill, after he uses 3 farm hankies to blow his big red nose." " I ......
" Bill you are such a big cry baby" Says Bonnie. "There's a Bicycle Store I saw up the street." Said Alyse. "Why don't we head up there & buy a couple of bikes & helmets & bike to Graceland!" They have tricycles for the inexperienced, dirt bikes for the sporty, mountain bikes for the challenged, & tandem bikes for lazy chickens. "That sounds like a good idea says Bill, after he uses 3 farm hankies to blow his big red nose." " I ......
training wheels
.... think biking to Graceland is an excellent Idea. Bonny i want you to understand something before we are in front of a salesman at the Bike store. Three wheelers or tricycle for those not savy with bike lingo do not need training wheels. I will be getting a full suspension Bike like the one I have at home. Elyse what pedals are in your future. Maybe you and GrandChester can do a tandem. we might even..
Natchez trace.
“You live and you learn, but if you never learn, at least you are still living.”
— Unknown
.... think biking to Graceland is an excellent Idea. Bonny i want you to understand something before we are in front of a salesman at the Bike store. Three wheelers or tricycle for those not savy with bike lingo do not need training wheels. I will be getting a full suspension Bike like the one I have at home. Elyse what pedals are in your future. Maybe you and GrandChester can do a tandem. we might even..
....let Wom ride in an electric moped behind us. I think we should travel along the Natchez trace. What do you think Wom ?"
"Who cares ?' Said Wom. A road, a track, a natchez trace, a laneway. Whatever. As long as I can ride in my moped, and store Bonny's booze stash in the back so she can't sneak a drink every mile, I don't care a less if it's a natchez trace or a Siberian trace. Ok, lets get going. Ladies first."
"Lets have some music Wom" Said Bill.
Wom switches on the radio in the moped, and they all head off to the beat of Queens "Fat Bottom Girls They Make the Rockin' World Go Round".
Wom switches on the radio in the moped, and they head off to the beat of Queen.
Elyse falls behind almost immediately. The group notices this and goes back to where she is standing on the side of the road with tears streaming down her cheeks. "I can't ride a bicycle from Las Vegas to Memphis!" she wails while Brian May and Freddie Mercury harmonize. "I was almost on an airplane, but the gate agents inspected someone else's bag, thought it was mine and wouldn't let me board! That was a good stethoscope they confiscated, too- a Littmann. Go on without me, because I can't do this. If I can't fly, then I'll have to rent a car. Or ride a train. Or maybe a tornado will swoop me up and drop me in Tennessee."
Everyone laughs heartily at this. "Elyse, that's so silly! You can't have a tornado in the Nevada Desert!" they shout.
bang a gong
Praying for peace in the Middle East, Ukraine, and around the world.
I've been Boo'd ... right off the stage!
Aaahh, I have been defrosted! Thank you, Bonny and Asiel!
Brrrr, I've been Frosted! Thank you, Asiel and Pomtzu!
"That's the power of kittens (and puppies too, of course): They can reduce us to quivering masses of Jell-O in about two seconds flat and make us like it. Good thing they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd surely have taken over the world by now." -- Paul Lukas
"We consume our tomorrows fretting about our yesterdays." -- Persius, first century Roman poet
Everyone laughs heartily at this. "Elyse, that's so silly! You can't have a tornado in the Nevada Desert!" they shout.
.....I guess you're right, said Elyse. With my luck it would drop me in Idaho or Wyoming anyway." Bill speaks up,
'Elyse why not tuff it out a little longer , we can make a little side trip to the Grand Canyon. If you still want a plane trip. You have every ones permission to take my Prospectors shovel and wallop Wom like you would bang a gong." "Why hit Wom",ask Elyse, Well he is the one with the scooter, said Bill, "One good wallop and he will just zip you right to.......
Hell's Angels
“You live and you learn, but if you never learn, at least you are still living.”
— Unknown
he is the one with the scooter, said Bill, "One good wallop and he will just zip you right to.......
who knows where?
Elyse says, "No, thanks. I'd probably land right on my backside in the center of the Las Vegas strip during rush hour. But I'd love to see the Grand Canyon! Turn up the volume, Wom, and let's get going. We're going to Graceland by way of the Grand Canyon!" She pushes off and gets the bicycle moving to gain a bit of a head start.
Just then: RRRRRRRRROAR! A group of Hell's Angels on motorcycles goes by...
jubilation
Praying for peace in the Middle East, Ukraine, and around the world.
I've been Boo'd ... right off the stage!
Aaahh, I have been defrosted! Thank you, Bonny and Asiel!
Brrrr, I've been Frosted! Thank you, Asiel and Pomtzu!
"That's the power of kittens (and puppies too, of course): They can reduce us to quivering masses of Jell-O in about two seconds flat and make us like it. Good thing they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd surely have taken over the world by now." -- Paul Lukas
"We consume our tomorrows fretting about our yesterdays." -- Persius, first century Roman poet
Originally Posted by GrandChester
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