Kym, my reading comprehension skills are not great so I'm not sure if the problem is in Tiff moving in your house or just to the same town.

If you mean for her possibly moving into your house, here is my .02 cents on that:

You have already raised your daughter, she moved away, married, and has her own children. It's now her responsiblilty to take care of herself and those children. It's no longer up to you. I think you have to use the tough love approach if it comes to that in this case.

I would feel terrible if I had to turn my kids down for help but.......if my health were in danger of worsening, I would say, "so be it", and expect them to understand. She should have enough respect for you to do that without question.

I always say, with some experience, that family relationships can quickly go bad in situations like this. Bad feelings will grow and may never be corrected again. What's the old saying about company being like fish? After three days, they both start to smell, so to speak. Anyway...something like that.

I think you could offer to help her find a place and help her get back on her feet again but from a safe distance. If that's truly what you want to do.

At 55 years old, from my perspective, I could never see myself living with one of my children under any circumstances. That may sound bad but, we're all very set in our ways and just not compatible as "house buddies" anymore. The same goes for me living with my mother or vice versa. If I have to do it I'll find a way but as long as there are choices, I'd like to keep us all comfortably seperated.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. I don't envy you at all-believe me!! I'm thinking she may be eligible for some type of assistance as well.
Again, she needs to do the leg work herself with possibly a little bit of assistance from Mom.