I personally think it's your SIL and brother's duty. You shouldn't have to involve yourself in it. If it's that important to them, they should find the courage to tell her ahead of time.

I kind of had the same problem. I felt so bad for my SIL when she was in labor. The family was all piled in there acting like idiots. By the time she had to push, she was sooo exhausted. If everyone wasn't standing in there causing trouble all day, she could have been resting and preparing for her hard labor.

I knew that there was no way in heck that I was going to go through the same thing. I wouldn't expect another family member to do the dirty work for me though. I have let it be known that no one will be in the room except my husband and possibly my son. There are lots of people that are upset and bothered by it but it's my decision and my childbirth, so they can bite me.

Maybe I'm just grumpy right now though. lol. Don't listen to me.