OMG!! You poor thing. I am so sorry.....................
You need some new friends me thinks.
HAPPY 30TH BIRTHDAY.
Go out to your favorite store and buy yourself something shiny. Doesn't have to cost much. But it should make you happy and every time you look at it, (be it a ring, braclet, neckace) know that you are loved, special and worth more then you will ever know.
AGAIN HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!