Grief comes in one size

[kuhio98]

I recently found the following quote on a website dealing with grief and healing:

"Grief comes in one size ... extra large. If we tuck it away in the bottom drawer where it never sees the light of day, it remains exactly the same. On the other hand, if we wear it, feel it, talk about it, and share it with others, it is likely that it will become faded, shrunk and worn, or will simply no longer fit. When grief has served its purpose, we are able to recognize the many gifts we have gained."

-- Dianne Arcangel, in
Life After Loss : Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

[carole]

That is so cool, thank you for sharing it with us all, I really like the way it has been written, well put.

[Cataholic]

Thanks for taking the time to post that!

[catmandu]

AS HARD,AS IT IS,TO THINK ABOUT,YOU DO HAVE,TO LET GO,OF THE GRIEF,AND GO ON,WITH YOUR LIFE,WHICH,IS SO HARD,TO DO WHEN,YOU MISS ,THE PERSON,OR PET,THAT MUCH.

[sirrahbed]

Thank you for posting that Lisa. I came to PT about 2 years ago I think? Before that - I really never talked about my pets that much because I did not know anyone who felt much like I do about my cats. Only my daughter Missy and I talked about the way we loved our kitties. My Bert kitty died about 8 years ago and I think I kept the grief hidden. Once I found this place and others who spoke freely about their love of pets and all - I started really crying for my Bert and wanting to tell about him. Now, I feel much happier about him and can think back to what he meant to me. He was an orangie which must explain the way I love the color! Of all the kitties that have been in my life, Bert was the only one who ever *chose* ME as his person and it was so nice. He loved me and would come when I called or snapped my fingers. There may never be another like him, but I am so glad that he was with me.

So I think now my "extra-large" grief has been let out of the drawer

[heidiv]

Wow that was truely an awesome quote.
I never really looked at it that way. I think I must be on the mend because all I think about is all of the truely great times me and my little Pricilla had and how great it was to have spent the 6 yrs that I did spend with her. Not the times that she was in pain.
Thank You again kuhio98

[kuhio98]

Originally posted by heidiv
Wow that was truely an awesome quote.
I never really looked at it that way. I think I must be on the mend because all I think about is all of the truely great times me and my little Pricilla had and how great it was to have spent the 6 yrs that I did spend with her. Not the times that she was in pain.
Thank You again kuhio98

Heidiv ~ I had a similar experience. It took a while, but after Kuhio was killed, I knew I was finally getting better when I could smile when I talked about her (sometimes crying at the same time). I guess time really does heal. After a while, you can think of your baby and remember all the wonderful time you had together instead of focusing on the last, final ending.

[skneisel74]

It has been a while since I have had a loss, but the quote is very true, I still have a tear now and then for my Noonie Bug, I lost her to FIV almost 10 years ago and I wish the avet had had the knowledge that they have today so he could have saved my precious one. Thanks for sharing that with us.....

[lizbud]

I too like the quote a lot. It does make sense to me. But what
do you do when everytime you try to talk about your RB angel, you end up breaking down in tears.No one want's to see that.