*I'm really upset. Some help understanding Parents, Please??*

[Suki Wingy]

Today I braved walmart and they had only one betta boy left, healthy and in a cup that must have been 1/2 gallon! There was a sign for crowntails too. They were $5.49. There was only room to store about 10 betta cups at a time, and away in the place the employees stand (even though there were no employees in sight) so stupid people couldn't put them together! I really wanted that little guy and I cryed afterward, because even though my mom admitted to me she knew that he wouldn't be a problem and that she wouldn't even notice him because he would be in my room and that I had enough cash for him, a 1 gallon tank, food, and dechlorinator, and I alreaddy have gravel and silk plants, she forbade me to buy him. She said if I even tryed to they would take Oslo away. (who isn't a problem at all, btw, even though they started threatening to give him away when they said before that I could keep him forever.) Oslo is my baby so I didn't dare try to take the little brown veil tail. When I made her come and look at him, she said "He either thinks you have food or he wants to fight you." when he swam up to me and danced around, but he wasn't flairing.
Every time I mention another animal my mom and stepdad get very tense and nervous and snappy and imedatly change the subject by accusing me and making me feel really bad. That or they just pertend like they never heard me and stare me down. Every time I cautiously come up to them and in a soft tone ask them if they could please explain why they don't want me to have anything living that requires care, even a very small potted cactus, they get really mad, and say "Because that is just one more thing to care for." And then I point out that I have hours of free time I spend drawing or reading the same would be boring books I have read 4 times before. They quickly end the coversation.
Also, they both claim to be big animal lovers, even though my mom always says (loudly in front of me, too, and it makes me sick to hear anyone, let alone my own "mother" say this) that my grandma should one day just take my aunts two cats to the shelter without telling her. Those cats are only slightly less important to her as her children. She and cousins are staying with my grandparents for a while and my grandma's 2 cats have to be locked in her room while my aunts 2 cats get the run of the house, then after a few hours they switch and my aunts cats are locked in the basement while my grandma's cats get the run of the house. They do this continually because the cats don't get along.
Do some of you parents maybe have any idea about their strange behaviour? My dad sure didn't. This is greatly bothering me and I really need to know.

[NoahsMommy]

From reading what you've said, your parents seem to have an issue with animals...even YOUR opinion of them.

Because you live at home, under their roof, being supported by THEM, you'll just have to respect that.

I wish I could offer help, but there really isn't much you can do. You have differing opinions, and I'll give you they are pretty hostile regarding animals...and you aren't in a position to do anything about it.

Just enjoy the animals you DO have...maybe volunteer at your local shelter? Work at a petstore?

[Vette]

I wish i could tell you something helpful...
but just wanted to wish you the best of luck and sending you *huggies* your way


i love plants.. even though i do NOT have a green thumb..LOL but my mom still buys plants for me. i still have a couple plants from when i was little,, that have somehow survied my black thumb...

[slleipnir]

My dad won't let me have any more pets either. Although I now may be able to talk him into something like a fish, I couldn't before. He said I have enough pets...I never got an actual answer out of him, but I'm sure he had his reasons...

[Suki Wingy]

yeah, well, I guess I'll just wait then. I am going to be working at petsmart in february but they take horrible care of their fish. It just annoys me because they always have shown before how much they love and care about animals. I wish my dad raised me instead, he has tryed to start me breeding skinks and also almost ordered me 2 day old fancy chicks for my last birthday as my 4H project but my mom got really mad at him when he asked, and he didn't want to get me in trouble.
edited for spelling.

[carole]

I am sorry I cannot explain to you why your parents react as they do, it is not the way I as a parent would be,however they have their reasons I suppose which at the moment are beyond me.

A little fish would be such an easy pet to take care of, and it sounds to me like you are a responsible young lady.

Unfortunately as you still are under their roof it is as Kelly wrote a fact you will have to respect their wishes for now.

I am sorry you are upset, and I do wish you could get a simple answer to your question, one that would come from your parents.

Do as other's have suggested, enjoy other's pets, and do some volunteer work, which is very rewarding.

Good luck.

[catnapper]

I grew up in the same type of home. Even today, now I'm married and with my own home and children, this is the conversation my dad had when he visited last week and Nicki jumped up onto the couch: Dad said, "Off Nicki. Animals aren't allowed on the furniture" I turned around and said (a little too meanly) "in MY house pets can do whatever they please, whenever, wherever" Ooops... I guess too many years of repressed anger over his opinions of animals?

As Kelly said, you have to repsect their rules while you live with them. They might not make any logical sense, but thats their feelings, and you need to respect that. Someday when you go off to college or to your own apartment you can fills it with as many fish, birds, cats, dogs, etc. as your heart desires. It will only make it all the more sweet to finally have something you've wanted for so long.

[carole]

There is an old saying that comes to mind " good things come to those who wait" so be patient sweetie, your turn will come and it will be ALL GOOD.

[Suki Wingy]

*sigh* I will try to be patient. I love my Oslo and Niño and Tigger and I'm greatful to have them.

[MariaM]

Originally posted by carole
There is an old saying that comes to mind " good things come to those who wait" so be patient sweetie, your turn will come and it will be ALL GOOD.

That definately happened with Major.

Don't worry Suki, I know exactly where you are coming from. My mom was like that about dogs. Of course they are much more responsibility, but it was much the same. Even when I tried asking for fish, and hamsters, she said no.

She's like that with other things. If I have my own money, and I earned it by working hard, and I want to buy a sweater for example, she won't let me. She would be extremely pissed off if I ever bought a DVD or cd. It's like that with almost everything I would like to have.

I bought a lamp once with birthday money from my godmother, it was $10.00. I never heard the end of it. She was so mad and kept acting like it was a horrible thing to do.

So I know what you mean when you say you can't understand why they won't let you.

[Anita Cholaine]

I know how's that.... it happened to me some years ago, when what I most wanted in the world was a dog... My dad always saying that he was an animal lover, but also saying that a dog was too much responsability, and that things.....we finally got Anita....

Now she's the only pet I have, and I like to have more, but I dont know why, they dont want to... I just dont understand...if we already have a dog, what's the problem of having more? We have a garden and that things, so I dont now what's wrong....

I think I'll convince them of having another dog this year, they are becoming more animal lovers like me......

THe only thing I can say is: enjoy the animals you have, and be patient...