Grrr!

[catnapper]

Tonight is the THIRD time in a month I've been out and about shopping and called a "Whitie" in a derrogative manner by a non-english speaking person. I have NO idea what I've done every time... the mere prescence of my whiteness insulted them?

Tonight my daughters and I were in Walmart buying up summer shorts and flip-flops. We were laughing and having the BEST time. Next thing you know, The woman behind me in line shoved me and started ranting to her companion about me (I KNEW it was about me even though I didn't understand a word she said) then she looked at me and called me a "F#$@ing Whitie" We left the store wondering what we did... was it me, was it my daughters? I just ignored them and pretended I didn't hear them, or that I was unaware they were talking about me.

We left the store and headed to the car - they FOLLOWED us and started shouting (again in spanish -- knowing full well we had no clue what they were saying) they gave us the finger, followed by a few vulgar gestures. Some of them were quite inventive, but we immediately understood their meanings.

We were AFRAID to leave the parking spot - for fear they'd jump in front of the moving car and try to sue us for hitting them. We were afraid to remain in the spot for fear they'd start banging on the car. Call the cops? And say what? That we were in line in front of them in Walmart?

Trust me, I am the LAST person to accuse of being racist... and I have the feeling they thought I was condeming them for being hispanic. Right now, I have a young man over who is best friends with my kids who I call "Number One Son" and his brother. If I was sooo racist, he would not be over. His race? Hispanic. I love this kid like one of my own (sometimes MORE than my own - he's never moody to me ) I know that isn't the point to the story, more a weak attempt at pointing out I don't care who speaks what language, who has what heritage... just as long as you are a decent, honest hardworking member of society.

My area is RIPE for a race riot. And its going to happen if the people keep pushing innocent people into arguements. I have NO CLUE what I did. Did I giggle too much with my daughters? Did I unaware cut in front of them in line? Did the girls get the last flip-flop in the color and size they wanted? I DON'T KNOW! But it ANGERED me to pull the race card and call ME a Whitie! What would happen if I called them a derrogative name based on their race? OMG... They'd have made my head spin!

What could I have done to them? What should I have done in response (other than flat-out ignoring them... which was my best choice)? Should I have called the cops? WHAT? I am so angry, so hurt. This was not an isolated incident.

[christa]

You probably did the RIGHT thing . . . in a situation like that, it's better to not make things worse. If you would have acknowledged their comments, they probably would have just gotten more riled up. Who knows what they were riled up about . . . . . .

You should really invest in some pepper spray! You AND your daughters! I have a small can that I carry on my keychain. Whenever I'm on a situation like that, or feel uncomfortable walking to my car alone, I get it out & put my finger on the trigger.

You can't be too safe these days.

Glad you're alright . . . Please don't let it get to you though . . . people in general are so cruel anymore! Just be careful & look into some pepper spray if you don't already have it!

[PJ's Mom]

I think you did the right thing. Doing anything else would've only escalated the situation.

Stay safe!!

[RICHARD]

Originally posted by christa
Just be careful & look into some pepper spray if you don't already have it!

You spray us Mexicans with pepper spray and it don't affect us...

We grew up on that stuff.

(that was a stereotype!!!!!)

It's the one percenters that are the troublemaking AH's that make trouble for the rest of us.

Advice? get pepper spray and if you are ever in a situation like that stay where there are other people and or video cameras.

I hope you never have any other problems like that again.

[NoahsMommy]

I agree...pepper spray is a good way to protect yourself from anyone that threatens you.

What a shame they pulled the "race card"...people are idiotic...

Hugs to you and your daughter, Kim. I'm sorry they almost ruined your day out with your daugher.

[LKPike]

Originally posted by christa
You probably did the RIGHT thing . . . in a situation like that, it's better to not make things worse.

I agree. But if it were me, without my family or respected friends near-by to see just how immature I can get, I would of went right back at them with their own little race-names. I've never backed off from any idiot wanting to start an unnecessary racial fight with me. So sorry theyve got their own personal issues with white people, its no excuse to attack innocent people, and I've never allowed anyone to get away with calling me honkey, whitie, whatever else 2 yr old name they can think up without having it thrown right back in their faces.

[moosmom]

Kim,

You did the right thing by walking away.

I USED to be like LKPike and always stood up for myself. I've been called Honkey, "Cracker", Whitie, etc., as well. There was a time when I wouldn't back down. Nowadays, you just can't. Some people think nothing of carrying a knife, gun, whatever in order to make themselves LOOK tough. It's nothing more than an act. And LKPike is right, it's THEIR issue, not yours. The best way to deal with it was what you did. Walking away diffused what could've turned out to be a very nasty situation. It left THEM looking like the idiots they are.

It's also possible that they thought you were laughing about them, considering they didn't speak English. It seems that English has become a second and third language in this country. Sad but true.

Just remember, sticks and stone can break your bones and names are so easy to let run off your back. A knife in the heart or a bullet to the head isn't.

[carole]

It just goes to show Racism is alive and kicking and it exists with all races, sorry you had to go through that awful experience, I think you did the right thing as well, walking away, that way only your feelings and dignity got hurt, it could have turned very nasty.

[Karen]

Document it, get witnesses. That's harrassment. Do NOT respond or retaliate to them directly, it lowers you to their (pretty low) level. If possible, get a manager of the establishment involved, and insist on a neutral bi-lingual person with you for any confrontation or discussion.

Being a minority doesn't give someone the right to be racist, neither does being the majority. It's wrong, and people like that perpetuate the stereotype both within their circle of family and friends, and negatively with whomever they encounter.

[lizbud]

Jerks with bad manners come in all races & nationalities. I would also talk to the management at the store & would not
hesitate to call the police if the harrassment continued outside
the store. Sorry you & your daughter had to experience that.

[jesse_3]

I'm so sorry that you and your daughters had your day ruined! I would have yelled at them (not names) I would have told them that I have just as much rights as they do and that I'm no different from them..I do NOT handle situations like that. I think that you did a good job handling that though!

[kuhio98]

You did nothing wrong. Perhaps it was an innocent misunderstanding that they interpreted as deliberate. I would have gone back to the store and asked to speak to the manager. While it wasn't their fault, I would have asked to be escorted to my car because I felt unsafe. The store won't like having that kind of problem and should begin to monitor things more closely and intercede on good customer's behalf.

What they did to you (if it was deliberate) was racist. It's there problem, not yours. You did nothing wrong.

[Pit Chick]

Call me immature, but I would have turned around and asked them what their problem was when they shoved you and called you "whitie". They physically put their hands on you giving you every right to defend yourself with a left hook and upper cut....or pepper spray. Had YOU made a racist remark they wouldn't have thought twice about calling the manager, cops, and news media.

[catnapper]

Thanks guys! Pit Chick, if my hubby was there, you'd better believe he's react like you. He works in the city's school district and is soooo tired of the kids doing ANYTHING they want and getting away with it because the school is terrified of being sued over discrimination. The kids know they are untouchable so they do whatever pleases their little minds. The district is TRYING to hire more minority teachers, but honestly, there's not many out there with a teaching degree.

I'm telling you, my area is ready to have a major race riot. I am ready to duck and cover come that day.