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Thread: a weight on this kid's shoulders.....

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  1. #1
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    Originally posted by WolfChan
    Rules are rules. If they're made clear, why violate them and then get mad when you have to face the consequences.
    I totally agree here.

    Also, in defence of the parents, they may not have known it was against dress code. When I was in highschool, there were (apparently) dress codes about backless shirts but when a girl got suspended for wearing one, NO one in the school knew they weren't allowed - not even her. Perhaps it should have been common sense, yes, but still - if there is a dress code it should have been accessible for all the students, and it wasn't.

    Maybe instead of saying the girl had to wear a coat, the counsellor should have asked her to call her parents right then for a new shirt. Either way, for all the fuss it's caused, I don't understand why the girl didn't just serve her punishment, which really isn't THAT big of a deal (come on - lunch detention? She doesn't even have to stay late after school!!). Rules are rules.. while it may have been a misunderstanding, it still is a school rule.

  2. #2
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    I still side with the kid. so I showed my mom the artical as well and she laughed saying how stupid the school board is being. for heaven sakes what in heavens name is so relvieling about a turtle neck sweater with little ovals cut on the shoulders! I mean really I was wearing off the shoulder outfits in kindergarden, this girl is in grade 6, and is a TURTLE NECK. when I was in grades 3 and 4, I was wearing off the shoulder shirts to school,and I still do, even if they were not off the shoulder shirts I purposly wore them off the shoulder. why? simple its comfortable. school are going WAYYYYYY to far with dress codes latley, my school has gotten to the point where I own 3 outfits, the same ones for 2 years, because there is absolutly nothing sold in stores that is not against the dress code anymore. I have a total of 3 outfits because of it. I wish there were uniforms because it would be a he77 of a lot easier.
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  3. #3
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    I'll just keep my mouth shut about dress codes...

    I have no clue what that school does about dress code, but where I teach, the first week of school there are class meetings and the principal and asst principal read the handbook to every kid and every kid and parent are given the handbook when they register, so, no excuses. Usually, if the kids wears something against dress code (thinking they're cute and getting away with something) we make them go down to the gym and put on their gym clothes and they wear those until suitable attire is provided. We have stupid parents who argue about it and threaten to sue and they just tell them to go ahead. I just wish ALL schools would go to uniforms and then these ridiculous arguments go out the window and the students can just deal with it. Whine and cry all you want, but, that's the way it is. The argument would last about a week and then they'd be quiet and get on with the matter at hand. Let's face it, school is not about having a fashion show, it's about learning and the fewer distractions the better.


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  4. #4
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    Originally posted by mugsy
    I have no clue what that school does about dress code, but where I teach, the first week of school there are class meetings and the principal and asst principal read the handbook to every kid and every kid and parent are given the handbook when they register, so, no excuses.
    We were given school planners on the first day of school. All it said about dress code was "no hats or gang attire" (whatever that means.. ). Really, the school dress code should have been in the front of our planners, so everyone could read it.

  5. #5
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    I totally agree with Karen and Mugsy.

    A rule is a rule. Period. You don't have to like it, you don't have to agree with it. But you DO have to follow it.

    I personally happen to think the 65 mile per hour speed limit on the highway between my town and the next town is STUPID ... especially since I got my turbo-charged car. I want to go 80 miles per hours. Can I? NO. A rule is a rule. If I break the rule, I get a ticket, I pay a fine, my insurance premium goes up or my insurance company drops me. I am an adult, I still have to follow the rules. We ALL do.

    Why is this little chickie so different? So special that rules do not apply to her? She's not. She broke a rule, she pays the price. Just like the rest of us. That is life.

    If her parents and enough other parents think the dress code is stupid, then they have a recourse. Voters elect the school board, the school board makes the rules. If enough people want the rule changed, then they need to campaign and nominate school board candidates that think like they do. That is how you change something you don't like in a democracy. You VOTE. You don't whine and complain and sue. You vote. Plain and simple. Don't like this school board's rules? Well, the vote in a new school board. It's called democracy.

    However, in the mean time, Ms. Sweater-Girl STILL has to follow the same rules that everyone else does. Period.
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  6. #6
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    If you bend the rules for one, you have to for all, Rules are Rules,and should be adhered to, they should all have to wear uniform like here in NZ and then there would not be these problems.
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  7. #7
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    This sounds very familiar. My husband is a 6th grade teacher and as Mugsy said, the first day of school there's rules spoken out loud, its sent home for parents to read and sign, and even posted in every teacher's room.

    The dress code is very simple and very easy to follow: dark or tan slacks. no capris or shorts. No jeans. White shirt that covers chest, shoulders and belly. Sweaters are permitted, but cannot have hoods, no sweatshirts are allowed. No gang colors or symbols. No bandannas (a gang thing) White sneakers or shoes, no sandals. Now, I'm paraphrasing here, but its really that simple. He's got girls that are in 6th grade that have ample C-cups (really) and they flaunt those with very cleavage revealing shirts. He can't say anything because the parents would say that he was sexually harassing their daughter - "why else would he have noticed her boobs if he wasn't looking at them?" Its really bad. I went in to visit him for lunch a week ago and I was rather shocked at what these kids were wearing. 6th graders looked very sexy! I sure didn't look like that at 12, then again, we weren't allowed to wear make-up or clothing like that.

    The schools are basically scared to say or do anything because of parents like that. A rule is a rule and everyone needs to follow them. I would say that the sweater described in the article was not in line with the dress code policy.

    Ha! My husband just called me on the cell phone... he wanted me to go shopping for a size 8 pair of white sneakers for one of his students... they're cracking down on dress code and he wants to get her a pair before she gets into trouble. Ain't he sweet?

  8. #8
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    The primary objective of Greenville County Schools is to provide a World-Class instructional program and learning opportunity for every student. The personal appearance of every student is an important component of establishing a safe environment for optimal learning and respect for one another.

    Students are expected to dress in an appropriate manner while on school district property or representing the school. Personal appearance shall be such that it does not disrupt student work or school order, become distractive to other students, or violate health and safety guidelines.

    The following minimum standards apply throughout Greenville County Schools and will be vigorously enforced. Principals may make additions to these standards.

    Student dress and grooming must be neat and clean.
    Middle and High Schools - Shirts/Blouses should be tucked in unless designed to be
    worn outside the pants/skirt. At no time should the student’s midriff be visible while standing, sitting, or participating in normal school activities, e.g., raising hand.
    Clothing that inappropriately exposes body parts is not permitted, including: low-cut shirts, tank tops, spaghetti strap tops, halter tops, and vests or see-through or mesh garments worn without shirts. Shoulder straps must be at least three inches wide. Bra straps and bra sides must not be visible.
    Students shall not dress in such a way that partially or totally exposes underclothing.
    Trousers/slacks/shorts must be worn at waist level. Excessively baggy trousers and clothing are not permitted. Clothing may not drag the floor.
    Skirts should fit and be in good taste and not be shorter than mid-thigh.
    Shorts may be worn, however, they must be properly fitted and in good taste and may not be shorter than mid-thigh. Biker shorts or athletic shorts of any kind are not permitted.
    Hats, sunglasses, hair curlers, skullies, or do-rags may not be worn.
    Shoes or sandals must be worn. Flip-flops (shower-type shoes) and thong-type shoes are not permitted.
    Clothing or jewelry is not permitted that displays profanity, suggestive phrases, alcohol, tobacco, drug advertisements, or other inappropriate phrases or symbols.
    Hair of a non-human color is not permitted.
    Extraneous articles hanging from clothing such as chains are not permitted.
    Facial jewelry is permitted to be worn only on the ears.
    This was taken directly from our School District's web site. I appreciate the fact that they are being careful about how students dress. Molly, I am in total agreement with you and others on why rules like this are important, and that the punishment that this 6th grader received. I would like to challenge her parents, given the opportunity!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
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    Originally posted by catnapper


    The dress code is very simple and very easy to follow: dark or tan slacks. no capris or shorts. No jeans. White shirt that covers chest, shoulders and belly. Sweaters are permitted, but cannot have hoods, no sweatshirts are allowed. No gang colors or symbols. No bandannas (a gang thing) White sneakers or shoes, no sandals. Now, I'm paraphrasing here, but its really that simple. He's got girls that are in 6th grade that have ample C-cups (really) and they flaunt those with very cleavage revealing shirts. He can't say anything because the parents would say that he was sexually harassing their daughter - "why else would he have noticed her boobs if he wasn't looking at them?" Its really bad. I went in to visit him for lunch a week ago and I was rather shocked at what these kids were wearing. 6th graders looked very sexy! I sure didn't look like that at 12, then again, we weren't allowed to wear make-up or clothing like that.

    what exactly are gang colors? that's a pretty harsh dress code!
    my brother is in 5th grade and there this one "little" girl in his class and she wears bright blue eye shadow, glitter all over her face, dark eye liner...the whole works, it shocked me when i saw her i was liike "who's that kid with the dumbmake up?" to my brother and he was just like "oh that's my friend"
    i wasn't allowed to waear makeup when i was twelve! not that i really even wanted to, i don't even wear much make now either, only alittle eye shadow or mascara and stuff

  10. #10
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    Nov 2003
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    Originally posted by G.P.girl
    what exactly are gang colors? that's a pretty harsh dress code!
    Gang colors are, well, the colors that represent particular gangs in the area. For example, wearing a red shirt is fine... but red is a very well known gang color in the area, as is blue, purple, and yellow. So, that said, if you wer a red shirt simply because you happen to like red, hey, that's fine. But if you wear a red shirt as a banner to show solidarity to the gang, then thats a problem. Believe me, the schools know who is involved in gangs and who is not. Last month, my husband was saying that a girl wearing red every day was definately in a gang, then she handed in a project with this gang's symbols drawn all over it. I don't know how else to clarify.... the teachers can more or less tell by a kid's actions and attitude whether they are wearing a color because they like it or if they are wearing it for gang reasons. We definately have a real big gang problem here.

    As for the dress code, no I don't think its harsh. I went to private school, so obviously my unfirom had to be exacting to their dress code. But this is an inner city school and the clothing problem has become very very bad. They want to try and make it mandatory black pants & white collared polo shirt for both boys and girls. I think it makes sense. That way, everyone is on a level playing field... nobody is showing off their wealth or poverty while the dress the same.

    In my husband's middle school alone, there are over 1,300 kids from 6th-8th grade. There are 4 middle schools in the district, each with as many kids. Thats a lot of kids. They need a pretty straight-forward dress code in order to provide some order.

    PS: not that this has anything to do with dress code directly, but a lot of my husband's sexier dressed girls are already <ahem> "active" and quite a few 6th-8th grade girls are waddling around pregnant. The school wants to get rid of the "temptation to play" while they are in school. The dress code needs to followed and needs to be rather strict to keep these kids from hurting each other. The hurt can be in forms of taunts because the kids can't afford nice clothes. Taunts of ethnic bias, taunts of calling a girl a Sleeze (well, they use stronger words not fit for me to type.) You'd be surprised what goes on in a large school. I was.

  11. #11
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    Believe me these dress codes are anything but harsh, Gosh in my day they were so darn strict, we had to have our skirts at a certain length, hair always tied up if past shoulders, etc etc, I am all for reasonable dress codes, sometimes the schools go overboard, like my friends daughter was just finishing her last year at middle school, only two weeks to go and they made her mother buy the PE shorts, now to me that is unfair, complete waste of her money, she has no further use for them, and could have worn her own shorts just for two weeks.

    The kids here take pride in their uniforms(well most of them) and they are expected to be neat and tidy in uniform, they are ambassadors for their school , so why not..

    I have no time for make-up and having to be in the height of fashion at school, the kids are there to learn not to compete with each other in the fashion department, there is plenty time in years to come for them to express their individuality, did me no harm, I have no problem dressing today,and feeling ok about myself, I don't think being in uniform stunted my individuality at all.

    I say stick with the dress codes or get them in uniform, my feelings are very strong about this, more important things to worry about, like the safety at school today, whether our children are really getting a decent education ,etc etc.

    P.S our children have a mufti day, one coming up this week, and have about 4 to 5 a year, they pay two dollars(this goes to the school or charity) and can wear their own clothes, jewellery etc, for that whole day.,so they still get the opportunity to display their Individuality.
    Furangels only lent.
    RIP my gorgeous Sooti, taken from us far too young, we miss your beautiful face and purssonality,take care of Ash for us, love you xx000❤️❤️

    RIP my beautiful Ash,your pawprints are forever in my heart, love and miss you so much my big boy. ❤️❤️

    RIP my sweet gorgeous girl Ellie-Mae, a little battler to the end, you will never ever be forgotten, your little soul is forever in my heart, my thoughts, my memories, my love for you will never die, Love you my darling little precious girl.❤️❤️

    RIP our sweet Nikita taken suddenly ,way too soon ,you were a special girl we loved you so much ,miss you ❤️❤️

    RIP my beautiful Lexie, 15 years of unconditional love you gave us, we loved you so much, and miss you more than words can say.❤️❤️

    RIP beautiful Evee Ray Skye ,my life will never be the same with out you ,I loved you so much, I will never forget you ,miss you my darling .❤️❤️

  12. #12
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    quite a few 6th-8th grade girls are waddling around pregnant
    *faints*

    Pregnant 6th graders?!?!



    My son is in the 7th grade. I think I'll call my veterinarian tomorrow and see if he will neuter him.

    "We give dogs the time we can spare, the space we can spare and the love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made" - M. Facklam

    "We are raised to honor all the wrong explorers and discoverers - thieves planting flags, murderers carrying crosses. Let us at last praise the colonizers of dreams."- P.S. Beagle

    "All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king." - J.R.R. Tolkien

  13. #13
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    I think that school uniforms are a good concept (though getting parents to freaking pay attention and care about what their kids are wearing would be better...) I went to a VERY conservative little private school from 8th-11th grade. The experience was a great one. I made a lot of friends and found that the classes weren't dumbed down for the masses as MANY public schools are *shudder*. There was a very strict dresscode the entire time I attended, and they ended up changing to uniforms my Junior year. My biggest gripe with uniforms and sometimes tight dresscodes is the cost. Do you know how difficult it is to FIND articles of clothing that adhere to a strict dresscode if you can't afford to buy all your clothing at stores such as Abercrombie? The school charged thousands of dollars a year for tuition but didn't even give a penny towards the insane cost of uniforms. They provided a catalogue, but I'm pretty sure it was from Land's End, so everything was enormously overpriced and not at all fitted to young shapes. I think that if a school is going to adopt a uniform code then they should at LEAST offer the clothing at a discounted price. Take the Air Force way for example- everyone has to wear the same thing from the same place, but we recieve a clothing allowance at least once a year to help out in the purchase of uniforms. I understand that part of the reason that the school charged so much was to make sure that only "serious" students attended, but come on, not all serious students can afford to spend all their money on freaking ugly clothes just so they can get a proper education. Don't even get me started on the policy that allowed for a teen father to stay in school while the pregnant teen was immediately expelled. If they're going to expel the girl they sure as anything should've expelled the guy too... *deep cleansing breaths*

    Originally posted by catnapper
    That way, everyone is on a level playing field... nobody is showing off their wealth or poverty while the dress the same.
    By the way, at least in my experience this statement is completely false. There were two main subdivisions in the school- the students who could afford to buy their khakis and polo shirts at Abercrombie, American Eagle, Aeropostal, etc. And then those students who couldn't afford to spend $50+ on a polo shirt. In my experiences there, there was even more division into cliques when we had the uniform code as opposed to just a strict dress code.
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  14. #14
    Originally posted by Twisterdog
    *faints*

    Pregnant 6th graders?!?!



    Ditto. *faints* I can't imagine an 11 year old having a baby. I didn't even know that stuff at that age! I was such an innocent child. LOL

    *faints again*

  15. #15
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    I'm married and nearly 20 and I practically faint at the thought of someone my age having a baby!
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