I just have to post my favourite again.
An interesting article highlighting British power over Germany.
The European Union have recently announced that finally an agreement hasbeen reached to adopt English as the preferred language for European communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and as such has accepted a five year phased plan to implement what will become known as EuroEnglish .
In the first year , 's' will be used instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly sivil servants will resieve this news with joy . Also the hard 'c' will be replased with 'k' . Not only will this klear up konfusion, but typewriters kan have one less letter .
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replased by 'f'. This will make words like 'fotograf' 20 per sent shorter .
In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible, which have always been a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of silent "e"s in the languag is disgrasful and they wil go .
By the fourth year , peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' by 'z' and 'w'
by 'v'
During ze fifz year , ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou', and similar changes vud of kore be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters .
After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
Ze drem vil finali kum tru !
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks