I knew this would happen..

**Marigold2** · 10-05-2010, 11:13 PM

OMG you poor thing. To lose your beloved and now to have to fight with his parents, it breaks my heart to hear the pain in your words and the frustration which you have EVERY right to.
Inlaws can be horrible sometimes. In their profound grief they might not be as kind as they should be. Which not all people are when they are suffering, some become kinder some not.
You are a good mom. This is your child and I honestly believe your decisions are spot on. Your son needs routine now. He needs a home, a mom and school, and friends. I hope that they will see this and be supportive to you. In no uncertain terms should they try and take your child. Yes they lost theirs, but they can NOT replace him with yours.
Please try and take care of yourself, this is such a stressful time and you carry such a precious package within you.
Hugs and the very best prayers to you and the children.

**Laura's Babies** · 10-06-2010, 09:08 AM

Sounds to me like she is not thinking straight in her grief! Why would their other son be entitled to half of the money from the sale of that car? Was that the agreement between him and your husband? Yes, I would make sure I got out of it what your husband put into it.

I tell you what, if all they are going to do is put more grief and worry in my life, I would consider cutting ties with them until they settle down and act right. All they are going to end up doing is messing up your sons life with confusion, all that negativity and make your life a living hell. You nor YOUR family need that.

I know of a similar situation that happened years ago. A guy married a Hawaiian woman while stationed there and brought her back home. His parents had expected him to marry a local girl and never accepted the one he choose because she was dark skinned. He had 3 kids with her... then he drowned. His parents like to have drove her crazy. They constantly messed with her, causing her more grief and problems all the time, non stop. She bought herself and the kids tickets and went back to Hawaii and his parents didn't see those kids again until they were grown. They miss seeing their grandkids grow up or be a part of their life simply because they could not accept their mother and respect that HE choose her to marry and have a family with.

I understand they are in the anger phase of their grief but they need to watch what bridges they may burn in that anger. Someday, they will be sorry!

**Taz_Zoee** · 10-06-2010, 10:12 AM

Along the lines of what Laura said. If they can't understand what you are saying about keeping your son and letting him visit on weekends, then maybe you have to tell them "it's weekends or nothing". I know you don't want to do that. I know you want your son (and daughter) to see their grandparents. But they are the grandparents, NOT the parents.
What angers me is that your MIL makes it sound like you can't raise him good enough and you will cause him to be confused. I think, having just lost his father, losing his mother would be the most confusing thing EVER.
You have the right idea, stand your ground now or it will just be more difficult down the road. Maybe once things settle a bit they will understand and you can all come to an arrangement of when they can have the kids visit.

We are here for you Isabel. You know you can count on your Facebook family. Hang in there! Hugs to you.

**lvpets2002** · 10-06-2010, 12:58 PM

I am so sorry that you are having to deal with the inlaws like that.. I will have to aggree with others.. Hang in there & Lots of Huggss..

**Pembroke_Corgi** · 10-06-2010, 01:49 PM

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I don't understand what your in-laws are thinking, since what your son really needs is his mom and like you said, to get into his new routine. It sounds like they aren't thinking straight right now...you need support, not more drama. I hope things start improving for you soon and you can get them to see reason.

**smokey the elder** · 10-06-2010, 02:12 PM

I'm with the "weekends or nothing" crowd. They don't need to keep making more drama for you. They're grieving, sure, but they don't need to dump on you too.

**wolf_Q** · 10-06-2010, 05:15 PM

Wow Isabel, I'm so sorry they are treating you this way.

You've dealt with enough. He's YOUR child, of course you want him to live with you, you're his mom. I hope they come to understand this, sorry that you have to go through all this. {{HUGS}}

**krazyaboutkatz** · 10-07-2010, 01:12 AM

Originally Posted by Pembroke_Corgi

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I don't understand what your in-laws are thinking, since what your son really needs is his mom and like you said, to get into his new routine. It sounds like they aren't thinking straight right now...you need support, not more drama. I hope things start improving for you soon and you can get them to see reason.

I agree. Please take care. (((HUGS)))

**Catherinedana** · 10-07-2010, 07:15 AM

Their behavior is disgraceful and they should be ashamed of themselves. What exactly do they want, to take the rest of your life away? If it were me, I would not allow them to see their grandchild at all, and with all the harrassment, I would get an order of protection for him and myself. . .that is for me. Have them buy you out as far as the car is concerned and be done with them. This will never end. People like that never change. Sorry for the harsh words but I have seen this time and time again and it enrages me. Sometimes you cut your loses and walk away. . .this might be one of those times.

I hold you in my heart, dear lady. I hope that you can heal and be happy once again.

Cathy