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Thread: Courtesy, manners and tradition

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  1. #1
    Join Date
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    Delaware, USA - The First State/Diamond State - home of The Blue Hens
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cataholic View Post
    Maybe I am one of the few, but, I do not object to the term 'honey', 'sugar', etc. If they were meaning to be rude, the term would start with another letter of the alphabet, closer to the beginning.
    IMO - using those terms of endearment to address a total stranger is not at all appropriate. It implies an intimate knowledge (no-not of a sexual nature!) of this person. My family and close friends can call me that - and I welcome it - but a total stranger has no business using those terms with me. I'd rather be called "ma-am" - after all - I do fit in that implied old age category! LOL
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Wolfy ~ Fuzzbutt #3
    My little dog ~ a heartbeat at my feet

    Sparky the Fuzzbutt - PT's DOTD 8/3/2010
    RIP 2/28/1999~10/9/2012
    Myndi the Fuzzbutt - Mom's DOTD - Everyday
    RIP 1/24/1996~8/9/2013
    Ellie - Mom to the Fuzzbuttz

    To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
    Ecclesiastes 3:1
    The clock of life is wound but once and no man has the power
    To know just when the hands will stop - on what day, or what hour.
    Now is the only time you have, so live it with a will -
    Don't wait until tomorrow - the hands may then be still.
    ~~~~true author unknown~~~~

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
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    Cincinnati, Ohio USA
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    Quote Originally Posted by pomtzu View Post
    IMO - using those terms of endearment to address a total stranger is not at all appropriate. It implies an intimate knowledge (no-not of a sexual nature!) of this person.
    And, that is what makes us so special and unique! It bothers me not at all. Some of my older clients- both genders- call me that. Maybe cause my first name is so difficult to pronouce? LOL.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Canada
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    872
    Guess I'm just stuck in the old fashioned upbringing I had. I still call people MR. MRS. or Sir. If these people become close friends by all means we do call each other by our first names but otherwise I would become tongue tied calling people older than myself by their first names. And I also don't like being called dearie, honey or sweetheart by clerks or other stranfers. It just makes me squirm. Guess we all have our preferences, just the way I was raised I guess. A bit straight laced maybe but I raised my kids the same way. I've known some colleages for ages and we are close but I still refer to them as Mr. or Mrs. because they are older and more experienced than I am .

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
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    Delaware, USA - The First State/Diamond State - home of The Blue Hens
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cataholic View Post
    And, that is what makes us so special and unique!
    Exactly!!! What a dull world this would be if we were all from the same mold!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Wolfy ~ Fuzzbutt #3
    My little dog ~ a heartbeat at my feet

    Sparky the Fuzzbutt - PT's DOTD 8/3/2010
    RIP 2/28/1999~10/9/2012
    Myndi the Fuzzbutt - Mom's DOTD - Everyday
    RIP 1/24/1996~8/9/2013
    Ellie - Mom to the Fuzzbuttz

    To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
    Ecclesiastes 3:1
    The clock of life is wound but once and no man has the power
    To know just when the hands will stop - on what day, or what hour.
    Now is the only time you have, so live it with a will -
    Don't wait until tomorrow - the hands may then be still.
    ~~~~true author unknown~~~~

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
    Location
    South Hero Vermont
    Posts
    4,746

    Terms of endearment

    Hmmmm, I will pause the next time I call someone deary or sweetheart, but it won't stop me! I usually pick the name to fit the situation and person. I can't control myself sometimes. I would never have thought that someone would think ill of me if I called them deary etc. etc. To each his own! I think endearment is nice! I would love to think that I had endeared myself to someone.....and imagine it to be a complete stranger! I am a happy go lucky type of person in many ways and will continue on with it!

    Would it be better to call the others (strangers) - dude or dudette? Just kidding. Isn't it funny how different a take we have on things in life? And isn't it nice that we can all talk about junk like this and still get along!!!

    Don't laugh, I call a close friend of mine dudette. I won't and cannot tell you what she calls me!!!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by sasvermont View Post
    I would love to think that I had endeared myself to someone.....and imagine it to be a complete stranger!
    But.............
    Just think. That person calling you dear or hon, is probably calling everyone else the same! That's not a very endearing thought IMO. Just take a look at those in line behind you at the checkout sometime - not always of the dear or hon class. LOL
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Wolfy ~ Fuzzbutt #3
    My little dog ~ a heartbeat at my feet

    Sparky the Fuzzbutt - PT's DOTD 8/3/2010
    RIP 2/28/1999~10/9/2012
    Myndi the Fuzzbutt - Mom's DOTD - Everyday
    RIP 1/24/1996~8/9/2013
    Ellie - Mom to the Fuzzbuttz

    To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
    Ecclesiastes 3:1
    The clock of life is wound but once and no man has the power
    To know just when the hands will stop - on what day, or what hour.
    Now is the only time you have, so live it with a will -
    Don't wait until tomorrow - the hands may then be still.
    ~~~~true author unknown~~~~

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
    Location
    South Hero Vermont
    Posts
    4,746

    Not everyone is dear or sweetheart worthy

    Hey Ms. Pom,

    Remember that not everyone qualifies to be called dear or honey. I, for example, save it for special people and circumstances and I trust if anyone is calling me dear or honey, they are responding to my being extremely nice to them, again special circumstances! I think of it as an exchange, not a given or everyday occurrence when dealing with the public! I earn my deary and honey terms and expect the recipients getting the terms from me, to do the same! I am not sure we are thinking of the exchange in the same light. That's OK.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Delaware, USA - The First State/Diamond State - home of The Blue Hens
    Posts
    9,321
    Quote Originally Posted by sasvermont View Post
    Hey Ms. Pom,

    Remember that not everyone qualifies to be called dear or honey. I, for example, save it for special people and circumstances and I trust if anyone is calling me dear or honey, they are responding to my being extremely nice to them, again special circumstances! I think of it as an exchange, not a given or everyday occurrence when dealing with the public! I earn my deary and honey terms and expect the recipients getting the terms from me, to do the same! I am not sure we are thinking of the exchange in the same light. That's OK.
    Ms Pom isn't necessary. You can call me Ellie!

    Let me clarify - my gripe is with people who call EVERYBODY that! I used to work in an office with a girl that called everyone "hon". She was young enough to be my daughter, and tho I did like her, I was not happy with the way she addressed me. I would have preferred she call me Ellie and I asked her to do so - since that's my name. It's almost like she couldn't take the time to remember people's names - so everyone was "hon".
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Wolfy ~ Fuzzbutt #3
    My little dog ~ a heartbeat at my feet

    Sparky the Fuzzbutt - PT's DOTD 8/3/2010
    RIP 2/28/1999~10/9/2012
    Myndi the Fuzzbutt - Mom's DOTD - Everyday
    RIP 1/24/1996~8/9/2013
    Ellie - Mom to the Fuzzbuttz

    To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
    Ecclesiastes 3:1
    The clock of life is wound but once and no man has the power
    To know just when the hands will stop - on what day, or what hour.
    Now is the only time you have, so live it with a will -
    Don't wait until tomorrow - the hands may then be still.
    ~~~~true author unknown~~~~

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