Sigh. Look what just found me. *Update 11/8* post #58

[Medusa]

I went to bed early; the ordeal just exhausted me, but I didn't sleep well and finally gave up at 4:30 AM and got up. Thought I might sleep in this morning but no luck. This thing is haunting me. I have a sick feeling that Buddy wasn't FeLV at all. I think that they rushed his neutering and that he died on the operating table. I have nothing to base it on, just instinct. They don't do intake on Fridays, they were squeezing me in as a favor. Four years ago, when I was finishing rescue and moving into this house, I still had several cats to alter and place and one of them, Sox, died while being spayed. The vet was very cold about it all; she called me and I thought she was going to tell me when I could pick Sox up but instead she said "Your cat died". Period. Boom. It turned out that Sox had a URI and she knew it but did the surgery anyhow. I didn't know it; she wasn't sniffly or anything or I wouldn't have taken the chance. I know that some vets do what they call Good Samaritan work but some resent it and she was one of them. I never went to her again. I just have the feeling deep in my gut that's what happened to Buddy. This isn't to disparage vets; God knows I love mine, even if I do have issues w/the staff on occasion. Buddy just looked and acted too darned healthy and I feel a big gaping hole in this house. It was made ready for him. I was even prepared for pee wars w/my males but this boy softened my heart to the point where I thought "Hmmm, Pidge isn't gonna like having Buddy in bed w/us but he's such a snuggler that I can't resist him". This whole thing just isn't sitting right w/me.

[pomtzu]

This thing is haunting me. I have a sick feeling that Buddy wasn't FeLV at all. I think that they rushed his neutering and that he died on the operating table. I have nothing to base it on, just instinct. This whole thing just isn't sitting right w/me.

Aw Mary, please don't feel that way. You can't beat yourself up over this. Perhaps it's just that you've been thru so much these past few months with Puddy and Pidge, that has you feeling very vulnerable right now. You'll never know for sure if this is what happened - just know that you did what was right and best for Buddy - and know that he is happy and healthy at The Bridge. Puddy will tell him all about you and what a wonderful cat Mommy you are.

[phesina]

My very deepest sympathy, Mary.

[shais_mom]

I'm so sorry Mary.
**hugs**

[columbine]

Aw Mary, please don't feel that way. You can't beat yourself up over this. Perhaps it's just that you've been thru so much these past few months with Puddy and Pidge, that has you feeling very vulnerable right now. You'll never know for sure if this is what happened - just know that you did what was right and best for Buddy - and know that he is happy and healthy at The Bridge. Puddy will tell him all about you and what a wonderful cat Mommy you are.

I have to agree. Humans fish deep for ways to assign blame in time of tragedy, so that we can tighten our circle of trust and perhaps avert the next one. But random horrors are often just that, random, and there never was a thing you could have done.

Love, Columbine

[kt_luvs_kitties]

I am so sorry Mary.

RIP Buddy.