as you know, i too am facing the same problems as you. i too, thought it would be best to keep dad in his own home. wow was i ever wrong. please think about moving him closer to you, to a skilled facility. this was the best thing i did for my dAD, i even think he has improved a bit!

not only will it give you peace of mind, but your dad will be cared for by people who know what they are doing an he will get 3 meals a day.....you can't ask for any more.

pm me if you need to ask more questions. my father adjudted within 2 weeks and is now happier and healthier, even gained a few pounds
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sorry about the typeing - i had thumb surgery and am now a left-handed person for the next 7 weeks. trust me, this is not fun either... think about all the things i HAVE to do without my right hand