Kim,

First, this is your home, your life...so I'll support you in whatever you feel is right.

Second, I don't know if you know who Dr. Laura is...but she sounds a lot like the "Meanest Mom in the World" ad. She is very, very, very ethical and is a no nonsence type of woman. She has a radio show and is a pyschologist. One day a man called in to say that his step-son had gotten voilent with his wife, the boys mother. This boy was around 15 or 16 and seemed to have no other father figure until this step dad came along...so he obviously had some issues. Anyway, Dr. Laura had some EXCELLENT advice in my opinion.

She said to go on living as though this kid DOES NOT EXIST. The entire parental unit MUST do this. You do not make food, do laundry, look at, touch, smell, go near...even WALK OVER this kid...or address this kid AT ALL. 100% of the time as far as you and hubby are concerned, she does NOT EXIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This will show your horribly misbehaved, ungrateful 'child' that unless she treats everyone in the family with the respect and care they deserve, she is DEAD to you all. I know it sounds harsh, but if you think about it, its a WONDERFUL idea. You'll have to let her cry, kick, scream, complain, yell, etc. The ONLY time you'll entervene is if she's voilent and she tries to hurt others. Then you would make sure that victim is safe and call 911. Be factual, honest and don't get emotional. Don't give ANY attention to this "child" whatsoever, for ANY reason. She can figure out how to feed and cloth herself. If you all as a family go ANYWHERE, she doesn't get included, she is INVISIBLE....she does NOT EXIST.

I trust Dr. Laura 150%....more than that even when it comes to advice on how to raise children because she ALWAYS has their interests at the very top of her heart.

The only problem I see you facing is having hubby comply. But...if he's good at ignoring the bad, he can ignore ALL of his child. Tell him it'll help her...maybe that'll work??? I don't know the entire situation, we all don't, so I can only hope and pray this would work. Its kind of what you do now as far as talking to her...just kick it up to the extreme.

Hugs, Love and Support,
Kelly