Wow ... what a thread! I don't even know where to begin!

I have mixed feelings about the father of the baby not being able to see the baby. I obviously don't know any details, none of us do, so it's impossible to give really good, informed advice. But I will say this from my own experience - what I thought and felt about my son's father four months after we split up was skewed, to say the least. I hated that man, and saw only the worst in him. As I'm sure he did in me. However, time heals all wounds and changes all things. He really wasn't the son of Satan that I thought he was at the time, and he certainly grew out of the bad habits he had in his early twenties. He is my son's father, and while he hasn't been the best father, he hasn't been the worst, either. And by knowing his father, my son has learned many things ... including the kind of father he does not want to be. Obviously, if this baby's father is a true creep, this is not applicable. But I'd be careful making hasty judgements about a man you just broke up with when you are both young. That baby and that man have the potential for a lifetime together as father and son ... with the rough places and good alike that come with any human relationships. Don't be too quick to erase that potential.

And Marigold's post ... wow. Do you seriusly believe that being able to afford a nice car and braces makes you a good parent? Or that driving an old car and not having a college education makes you a bad parent? I know children who are living in poverty, or pretty darn close to it, who have loving homes, wonderful parents and are being raised with values and ethics. And I know kids who live in million dollar homes, drive brand new Hummers when they are sixteen years old, and have miserable lives. Bad parenting, neglect, alcoholism, drug addiction, abuse, molestation ... these things occur in familes from every income level. Simply because it is a two-parent, affluent household does NOT necesarily make it a good home. And just because it is a single-parent, lower income household does NOT necesarily make it a bad home.

I was a single parent for fifteen years. My son was loved, cared-for and taken care of. We had less possessions than some families ... but we had more than others. And a happy child, a loved child, a good home has almost NOTHING to do with possessions anyway. I know a lot of weathy single women, and I know a lot of dirt-poor married couples. Your assumptions and prejudices simply astound me.