When I cut my finger real bad at work, they got me off the boat and had me taken to the ER. Sitting in ER people would ask what you were there for and one girl asked and I told I was a cook on a boat and I cut my finger real bad. She instantly said "Oh? Great! You can go home and draw workmans comp!"...
I smiled at her and told her "Believe it or not, I am one of those crazy people who would rather WORK than be laid up at the house bored to death and I am a COOK!! What is a cut finger to a cook anyway?"... The shocked look on her face was priceless.

Someone needs to tell that idiot in the wheel chair that life is to short to spend it in a wheelchair FAKING a injury!