Hi Janine
I can sense the anguish in your "written voice"! Somewhere on this forum someone has posted about keeping a newcomer cat/kitten in the spare room on its own and introducing it gradually after a few days, to the other cats/rest of the house.It must seem overwhelming to Joey, like when we first visit/move to a new city,we stick close to home and gradually widen our circle as we become more confident and at ease with our surroundings (I do anyway) I think putting him in the spare bedroom is a good idea,make sure he gets to see you a lot and feeding/petting times are regular, make sure he can smell the other cats on you etc. but don't let the girls in there, just bring him out after a few days for a few minutes at a time. BTW, I find white vinegar is good for removing cat urine smells, a lot cheaper and no harmful chemicals. Worked fine on my carpet. - Best wishes, TopCat.