Oh Miz Livvykat I kin 'pletely unnerstan!

I wokez my mommy upz from her napz reel gentle wif kissies on her headz andz you knowz whatz happened a bitz laterz? She askidentaly lockedz me in da bafroom an da lightz wuz offz!! I triedz 2 be gudz but I ain't got no litterbox in dar 'n I kinda hadz 2 go. I triedz crozzingz my pawz diz way and dat wayz but I jist kouldn't holdz it anymore! So I didz my bizniz and din satz inna corner and munched onna Cutie-Tip. (I dunno how dey gotz dat namez...I tinkz I iz much cuterz.) The Cutie-tip din't tastes as gudz as I thoughtz it wouldz so I chewied on da plunger handle insteadz. Den I heardz my Momma callin' "Sooooppphiiieeezzzz." And I sedz, "Innnn heeerrreeeee..." but I guessez she din'tz hearz me cos she kept callinz "Sooooppphiiiieezzzz...." and I kept sayin'z "Innn heeerrreeeezzzz" but it still tookz her awhilez to findz me.

When she finally foundz mez, she feltz really badz and I got a baby karrotz anna yogurt dropz. Don't tellz her but I'm gonna pretendz to be madz until I getz some more parsleys outta diz deal...