I just got this in an e-mail and it gave me a good laugh this morning. Enjoy!
Christmas Cookie Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequilla
Sample the Cuervo to check quality.
Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo
again, to be sure it is of the highest
quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one
cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again.
At this point it's best to make sure the
Cuervo is still OK, try another cup ...
just in case.
Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2
leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in
the cup of dried fruit, Pick the
frigging fruit off floor... Mix on the
turner. If the fried druit gets stuck
in the beaterers just pry it loose with
a drewscriver. Sample the Cuervo to
check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.
Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon
juice and strain your nuts. Add one
table. Add a spoon of sugar, or
somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash
the oven.
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees
and try not to fall over. Don't forget
to beat off the turner. Finally, throw
the bowl through the window, finish the
Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the
dishwasher.
CHERRY MISTMAS
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