How did you meet your spouse?

**wolfsoul** · 10-07-2006, 01:06 PM

It seems that lately all of my friends have been getting engaged, or moving in with boyfriends, or just getting into serious relationships.

I'm always so busy with the dogs that I never really "look" for someone. They always say that you should never look, and I don't -- doesn't seem to work for me lol. I've tried meeting people over the internet, but it always ends in disaster. My dream is meeting someone at a dog show, but the chances of that happening and still having him live nearby are very slim. Now that I'll be 19 in just over a week, I'm going to be going out alot more, clubbing, to bars, etc. Are these good places to meet someone though?

I'm just tired of seeing all of my friends in relationships and yet I'm always alone. I often think it's because I'm just waiting for the right person. I am quite picky about the kind of person I want to be with. I date often enough, but always with guys I meet on the internet. I think I need to really meet someone and know someone before dating them. There is a guy I know of that I'm curious about -- he does agility with my club. I'm tempted to ask a friend to set me up but I want to wait and see if he and I can be friends on our own first. Do you find it works better this way? The way I am picky about guys, people often tell me they think I may have been sexually abused as a child. I don't think I was, but I have no idea.

So how and where did you meet your significant other, and how did you know he/she was the right one for you?

**Jessika** · 10-07-2006, 01:12 PM

Thats actually a funny story... I met my fiance through a mutual friend of ours'... who, at the time, really liked me. We three hung out one night (five years ago in November

) and went to the movies and whatnot. Our friend was going to ask me out that night... (I didn't find that out until later). But HJ pulled him aside (leaving me alone in the car...) and asked him if it was ok to ask me out. Now that I think about it, it was so... high-schoolish haha it's crazy to think that was so long ago and here we are getting married in three months!!

Seriously though I was not looking, either, and I definitely did not expect anything to happen (in fact I was expecting him to break up with me not too long after because I thought I was too "boring"), it just did. So when the time is right, you WILL meet someone unexpectedly. I can promise you

Oh and we are still both really good friends with the guy, he is actually our best man in the wedding

**Dorothy39** · 10-07-2006, 01:17 PM

The subject seems wild, ( that someone would ask) as to how I met my spouse!!

I met him, well, knew him, during grade school~~~ and I thought he was a nerd

~~ Oh well, fast forward folks, this guy caught my eye

, and , my High School friends knew that I had a HUGH crush on him!!

Word got out, and he asked me out ~~~ to a High School Dance~~~

And, We are still DANCING!!!

I'm lucky, I got the winning ticket, the first time around!!!

**Jessika** · 10-07-2006, 01:23 PM

Originally Posted by Dorothy39

I'm lucky, I got the winning ticket, the first time around!!!

I know, so did I, and it's awesome

**jenluckenbach** · 10-07-2006, 01:30 PM

Charlie (my spouse of 23 years) and I were both into raising rabbits for show. So we met through the rabbits clubs. (the best way to meet someone is through a common interest. I bet your future spouse is right now breeding Chihuahua's....LOL)

**ashleycat** · 10-07-2006, 01:35 PM

19? I got married at 19 and regret it. I still have and had a lot of growing up to do. Now I have a lil girl. Whom I LOVE sooo much and I wouldn't change that. But I really wished I had gotten to grow up before I got married at such a young age. I'm 24 now. And although I have a house, a car, getting to stay at home. I'm not happy now. Material things don't makeyou happy. So... Don't get married just because everyone else is. Keep on living untill you KNOW he/she is the RIGHT one.

**carole** · 10-08-2006, 02:20 AM

Well I had been on my own with my son for about eight and half years after leaving my previous Husband, and as a lot of you know I have social phobia so i did not go out much at all, so never had the chance to meet anyone, everyone said i had better start going out or i will never meet anyone,how wrong they all were, i met my present husband Steve two doors down from where i live, my son played at his nephews house, it was funny really i had met him only once and was not that taken, he made a comment about solo parents which i took the wrong way( I now know he has the utmost respect for them) anyhow to cut a long story short, the idea of dating him was put in my head by his sister n law, at first i felt kinda like they were just hitching me up with anyone, but i guess my self conscious started playing on me, and i had been invited out to watch his brother play in a band at the local tavern, i hate pubs and only went because i thought Steve would be there, so i came home got all dollied up and then found out he was babysitting their children, he commented on how nice i looked, so i was disappointed and found out later they were trying to hitch me up with the drummer in the band, Rob was cute but not my type, i came home and then he and the sister n law walked me home two doors down, which kinda annoyed me as i saw this as chance to get to know him, well anyhow two weeks later i plucked up the courage and invited him over for coffee, and really he never left, two weeks later he moved in with me and two months later we married, we have been together now for 15 years.

**christa** · 10-07-2006, 01:32 PM

I knew my hubby for YEARS before we even spoke. Our dads were best friends while we were kids, but he was a BOY and I was a GIRL and we didn't even go to the same schools, so why speak? ha ha I knew who he was, that was about it. It's funny because his mom has a "congrats" card that MY parents sent to his parents when he was born. Destiny, lol.

So in highschool, his senior year, my junior year, I became interested in him, for some reason. I basically asked HIM out . . . yes, *I* took the initiative, sometimes you have to . . . and the rest is history! That was 8 years ago, we've been married 3.

But I always believe that there's someone out there for everybody . . . it's not horrible to wait. Just be patient.

**Glacier** · 10-07-2006, 02:04 PM

I probably shouldn't tell this story since it's not romantic at all and makes me look like a drunken tramp, but here goes anyway....

I spent the afternoon helping a girlfriend get ready to throw a birthday party for her boyfriend. This for some reason involved several pitchers of margaritas. Fast forward a few hours to the party and I'm very drunk. I was 23, I was a bit of a wild child at that point in my life! I'd never seen Stuart before but he knew the birthday boy so he had been invited. When he walked in, my friend told "stay away from him, he's trouble." Of course, I immediately had to find out why he was trouble and introduced myself. I'm actually quite reserved, but Tequila always gets rid of that side of my personality! We left the party together a few hours later, spent the next three days together and then didn't speak for two years. I lived a couple hours away at that point and life just got in the way. He was seeing someone else, I was in a messy something, I hesitate to call it a relationship! It's a good thing though. If we had tried to have a relationship at that point, we wouldn't be together now.

2 years later TO THE DAY, same friend calls me and says "guess who's house I'm at". I had moved by then, bought my own condo and turns out he had bought a house about 8 blocks away. I went over to have one drink, talk to my friend, say hi, and never left. We got married exactly one year later--again to the day!

At 19, a house plant would have been too big of a committment for me. I was 26 when we got married, Stuart was 32. At that point, we had both seen and done enough to know we were ready to settle down. It was very important to me that I never have to depend on a man for anything. I got a degree, worked in a demanding field, loved my job, bought a condo on my own, had my own vehicle, my own money ect. Stuart had gone to school, travelled the world, had his own wild streak ect. Neither of us ever has to wonder if we're missing something--we know we aren't, been there, done that!

My sister got married at 19. She's now 32, has three young children and is in the middle of an ugly, bitter divorce.

My mother, a very wise woman, gave me some advice when I started dating. She told me to never get involved with someone I "couldn't live without", look for someone I could live happily with.