Found these cat themed jokes in another forum and thought you'd enjoy them, too.
A new cat, a handsome Tom, had come to the neighbourhood, and all the other cats were very interested so one of their number had the first date.
“Well,” the chorused the next morning, “how did you get on?”
“Pooh!” replied the favoured creature, rather a nice Persian. “An absolutely wasted evening, my dears. All he did was talk about his operation.”
Two students shared a flat and a cat. Neither of the students was a particularly good cook. One day one of the students returned to find his flatmate wringing his hands in despair.
“What happened?” asked the student.
“The cat ate your dinner.”
“Don’t worry,” replied the first student. “We’ll buy another cat tomorrow,”
The vet had just supervised the delivery of a litter of kittens to the old spinster’s cat. “I just don’t know how it could have happened,” said the spinster. “Tibbles is never allowed out and no other cats are ever allowed into the house.”
“But what about him?” asked the vet, pointing to a large tom sitting in an armchair.
“Oh, don’t be silly,” replied the spinster. “That’s her brother.”
A Tom cat owned by an elderly lady stayed out so late at night that she decided to take him to the vet.
On his return, however, the cat still stayed out late so the old lady thought that she would follow him and find out where he went. Very cautiously she crept after him, down a back alley, into a yard, where, surrounded by an admiring ring of other ‘toms’, he was holding court.
And the moral of the story is: even if you have lost the where-withal, so long as you retain the know-how, you can always set up as a consultant.
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