I *did* do the right thing (follow-up)

[Samantha Puppy]

Last week, I was put into a very uncomfortable situation in which one of my coworkers said something very inappropriate to me. Rather than repeat myself, click here to read about it.

Here is what happened since last Thursday/Friday. My boss had her meeting with the entire executive group of the company (CEO, President, several VPs) on Monday. They launched an investigation into this coworker's internet and e-mail usage. I was told (in confidentiality by another coworker who was in on the meeting but wasn't supposed to say anything) that if they found anything else questionable in this guy's e-mail or internet usage, that he would be fired. If what he said to me was an isolated incident, he would be reprimanded in some way. As of Tuesday, that's where things stood.

Yesterday, the president of the company shows up unannounced. I am pulled into a meeting with both her and my boss and told - again - that I did the right thing in going to them. They apologized on behalf of the company and let me know that due to other findings, this coworker of mine would be terminated immediately. They allowed me to leave the office while he cleared out his desk, which I also appreciated.

TODAY, however, I found out even more. I found out that the president of the company had printed out some inappropriate e-mails she discovered in his profile (no inappropriate websites as he deleted his cookies at the end of every day) and that there had been MORE but she didn't want to waste anymore paper and was getting sick to her stomach seeing some of the things he'd written. The stack she had though - which again, was not all of them - was 2" thick. And while he deleted his cookies every day, he was dumb enough to send URLs from his work account to his home account so even though they weren't in his internet history, they were in his e-mail history! Moron. Not all of the inappropriate things were sexual in nature - he had religious things as well as racist things. They had the company's lawyers come in and showed them what they'd found and asked what their options were and the lawyers said, "If you don't get rid of him immediately, you have a huge lawsuit on your hands."

So what I did was actually just the straw that broke the camel's back. He did this to himself. There is no place for that in the workplace and he chose the wrong person to say something offensive to.

Anyway, just thought I'd let you all know what went down.

[caseysmom]

Well besides being a racist chauvinistic pig he was also dumb....serves him right.

[JenBKR]

It does serve him right. You must feel relieved - good job!

[Karen]

See! We *knew* you did the right thing - and now you do, too! And now you know you work for a good company that responds in an appropriate manner, too. All around good.

[moosmom]

What Karen said!!! That must be a huge load off your mind. Great job!!

[jackie]

I am glad you got over that unsure feeling!

It sounds like this guy got exactly what was coming to him.

[new mom to a veiled]

Good for you............pat yourself on the back for having the courage to go to your boss!!!! Now nobody else has to put up with his crap either!!!!

[finn's mom]

Good to hear, Jaime. Thank you for the update, I was wondering what happened.

[Scooby4]

I've been there in your situation but unfornately, they don't always get the proper reprimand . It is VERY tough to say something and it was apparent this guy had a history of this behavior. You just happened to be "outside" of the direct loop and weren't aware of it. It took someone like you to help out those who couldn't or wouldn't say anything. Men like this usually get away with this behavior because many women don't feel comfortable of saying anything. Too much stigma on what sexual harassment is or isn't. You have to know WHEN to fly off the handle at an offensive remark versus a bad joke. This incident clearly was wrong and there was proof. I am glad you didn't respond nastily or in the same manner of speak because that could have lessened the view this was offensive.
I am a female Electronic Technician and part-time electrician. A VERY male dominated field. It is hard to establish the "offensive" line when you are the ONLY female in a group. I've had to put up with my fair share of offensive statements and harassment. Unfornately, by my putting up with this behavior, my complaints often go out one ear. It is just considered "part of my job". My bosses comment that : I knew I was going to work around men and that I should expect to hear these type comments. I agree but to a point. However, there have been times that even my male co-workers have been offended by the comments some have said to me. That is when the line of offensive appears... That is when it gets even tougher because I lose the respect of the other male co-workers who are offended if I don't say anything, and if I do say something then I look like someone who cries out "sexual harrassment" and don't get trusted.
That is why I am glad you stepped up and said something. You most likely helped other women who had felt helpless and were afraid to speak up. It took someone brave enough like you to say you've had enough.
By the way, my izzle fuzzile cussizle... Do you think he knows that purple isn't the proper color? Sounds like "blue balls" travelled upward...

[Oggyflute]

Good stuff Jamie. I'm glad your company took the matter responsibly and appropiately.
Scooby, there is still no excuse. I have ten service technicians working for me, and I have only one female who works the shop floor. Things can get out of hand comment wise, and I've always said to my female staff member that she is to bring to me any comment she finds offensive, and I will take action. She's a good worker and most often than not gives a lot better than what she gets, and seems comfortable with the work environment. In saying that I'm very much aware of my responsibilities.

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Good for you............pat yourself on the back for having the courage to go to your boss!!!! Now nobody else has to put up with his crap either!!!!

Couldn't have put it better myself - well done!

[Ally Cat's Mommy]

I'm glad things worked out for the best - you are VERY lucky to have a company who handled the whole matter with such deciciveness and sensitivity.

A couple of years ago I had a problem with a co-worker who would make horrible comments about my weight. (You have no idea how many times I cried thinking about things he had said) - and these comments also happenend in front of other people. I eventually complained, but he then played the " victim" and I came off looking like I was complaining because he was Indian, and I could not cope with the male-dominated office in which I worked. (One disadvantage of being a " white South African" is that people automatically assume you are a racist).

Eventually I told hubby, and at the next company " do" he cornered the guy (who was all of 5ft 4 - you probably all know Warren is 6ft 2 and HUGE) and said to him " so you are the little short sh!t who is upsetting my wife - do it again and you will have me to deal with" - needless to say my colleague had very little to say to me from then on, but it would have been MUCH better if my manager had handled it differently.

[gini]

It pleases me no end that your company handled this so well. No one needs to work in that kind of environment.

Years ago a woman was accosted and forced into the back seat of a man's car. Another friend saw what had happened and (long story here) rescued her.

The poor girl was shaking all day - and what did the boss say? "Well, you didn't get raped did you?"

All of the women just stood there and stared at him.....................

You sure did the right thing...............and that guy needs some major help!

[Samantha Puppy]

Thanks everyone. Yesterday afternoon, I found out that the 2" thick stack of paper the president had printed out documenting his misuse of company e-mail was just from the last two weeks alone. This guy has SERIOUS issues. Unfortunately, he's been in contact with a coworker of mine here and he is completely lying about what happened, saying that the company wasn't giving him enough billable work, etc. I understand 'saving face' to friends and all, but this makes me worry that he will not learn anything from this at all, which is sad. The guy was intelligent and knew his stuff. Dummy.

[Soapets]

He's not accepting responsibility for his actions, and he probably doesn't understand what all the fuss is about. He may be intelligent in some ways, but he is very, very deficient in other ways. I've worked with people with similar characteristics, and they just don't see things from the same perspective as "normal" people do. It's sad for them, and bad for society and the people who have to work with them. He'll never have job stability, and he'll probably never understand why.

That being said, you absolutely did the right thing, and your superiors at work are ALL aware of it, and it's got to make things much more positive at work. If you had NOT said anything to the proper people at work about it, you would have been contributing to "enabling" this man's actions. You are a real asset to that company, and now everyone there knows it! You probably saved the company from becoming involved in a huge lawsuit, and that should be worth a lot to the company, too. GOOD JOB!

Deb