My Baby Boots

[Tinkerboots]

You came into my life,
not knowing what to do.
You looked at me for acceptance,
I began to love you.
I took you in my home,
cleansed your fears away.
I nourished you with fullfillment,
causing you to stay.
You loved me with no boundaries,
as I did the same for you.
You became my companion,
my best friend too.
You made me laugh,
with your random excitement.
When I would cry,
your shoulder you lent.
As years went by,
we grew together.
Never missed a day,
without one another.
You became my angel,
rescued me when I needed you.
Yet, the time has come,
I must do the same for you.
I've put my fears aside,
to show you I am strong.
To keep you in such sorrow,
would be wrong.
I am sending you to heaven,
where God and his angels sing.
It'll be alright my baby,
for you have earned your wings.
We'll be together one day,
just be patient, you'll see.
Before you know it,
you'll be singing with me.

-Dedicated to Boots. Written by: J.T. (me)

My Angel, formally known as Boots, was put to sleep a few days ago while I was visiting my father who was across the US in ICU. He had a big tumor right next to his heart which developed into cancer. I wasn't able to be there for Boots because he wasn't supposed to be put to sleep until I got back. While I was gone, Boots had gotten worse. My step father called me to let me know of his condition, I had to make the decision over the phone, hundreds of miles away, to not make him suffer and wait for me to be there. I feel horrible that I was not able to be there. After returning home, the thought that he was gone did not fully sink in until I got to my bedroom. He wasn't there to greet me like he used to. It's been very hard for me since. I can't forgive myself that I, his mom, wasn't there to let him know it's okay. I can only hope that he understands I was too far away at a hospital. Otherwise I would have been there. I love you Boots, I always will sweetheart... I'm so sorry. I'm truely sorry.