I found this somewhere:

The 10 Biggest Lies

1. The check is in the mail.

2. I'll respect you in the morning.

3. I'm from the government, and I am here to help you.

4. Trust me, I'll take care of everything.

5. Drinking? Why, no, Officer.

6. I never watch television except for PBS.

7. … but we can still be good friends.

8. Don't worry, he's never bitten anyone.

9. I've never done anything like this before.

10. … then take a left. You can't miss it.


Have you got any good ones?

How about:

11. I'm going to ask her for a divorce tomorrow.