A Fiercer Battle In Today's Divorces

[lizbud]

Who gets the dogs,cats or other pets? This is an interesting
article from the Christian Science Moniter. I'll bet this kind of
thing happens more often than we know. What would you do?

http://www.csmonitor.com/2004/0126/p11s01-lihc.html

[lovemyshiba]

That is sad.

I know a friend of mine from high school whose aunt and uncle had shared custody of their 2 dogs. It was funny then, but it's not at all to me anymore.

As the article is describing the joint custody, I think that may be hard on the animals. It would be on my dogs. Being shuffled all the time takes them away from their routine, and my dogs thrive on their daily routine being the same every day.

Jokingly, my husband and I have said that if we were ever to split up, he would live in the basement, and that way the dogs could stay here and have both of their parents.

[ILoveMyAbbyGirl]

In my situation, Abby is staying here at home, my mom can't even have pets, but she said if we ever needed someone to sit her, she would be the one. But if they did ever break up Abby would still be here.

[Miss Meow]

Shane and I have discussed this during arguments. Funnily enough, the logistical nightmare of splitting up the pets usually ends the original argument!

The only firm things we could agree on were he'd get Schnaggles and Jasmine, and I'd get Mini and Buffy. But ... Jasmine and Mini are a pair and must stay together, as do the dogs. Mini also loves Tabasco, but Tabasco is also very close to Pickles, who is quite chummy with Jasmine these days, so it's all too hard. Shane said he'd live in the shed and come and visit - much easier

[Twisterdog]

I have customers who have legal joint custody of their two labs. It seems to work out well for both of them, and the dogs.

I think divorcing with pets is a lot like divorcing with kids - it depends on the level of maturity of the adults involved. Pets, like kids, can be used as pawns in an immature battle. Or they can be loved and shared by two mature adults who simply decided to go their separate ways.

When my ex and I split up, I took the dog and the kid. He got his own dogs ... and sees our son whenever he wants. Things are fine.

[Fox-Gal]

My X-husband and I fought over B.J. during our divorce and it got pretty nasty there for awhile. We had to prove who's property B.J. was and if she was a marital asset.

I ended up winning because I had all the check stubs for B.J. vet bill out of my personal account. The whole thing was bad, I had to prove ownership of her just as I did my Car, it just wasn't right.

At one point my X broke into the house and took B.J., I had to go back to court again to get her back.


The Judge didn't seem to want to know what was best for B.J., just who owned her!!! B.J. would have never made it with my X, she was too ill and took a lot of care, that he never gave her while we where married. I knew he would not care for her if he got her.

She became a much happier dog after he was gone and stoped trying to run away, as she use to do. She even listened better, although she did bark a LOT more at night. I belive she was trying to gaurd me.

[Barbara]

Originally posted by Miss Meow
Shane and I have discussed this during arguments. Funnily enough, the logistical nightmare of splitting up the pets usually ends the original argument!

We also know we can't split up as long as there are the children

I know a couple who have a dog in joint custody. When it's his weekend she brings the dog in the office here and he picks him up. The dog, a big black lab, is now over ten years so I suppose it is a matter of only a few years.....

[ramanth]

I wasn't married to him, but when Mike and I broke up, I had this fear.

I picked out Kia, but he was the one that picked her up the next day and paid her adoption fee. He would say one minute, "If we break up, you're taking the dog." to, "I changed my mind, I want Kia."

I knew that if we ever did break up, I had to have her, and thankfully when we did 8 months later, he told me to take Kia.

He did pay for the first few vet visits (when we were together), but after that, I paid for everything. (food, toys, vet, ect.)

It's been two years, but if Mike suddenly changed his mind, could he take Kia? I don't know and that scares me.

[catnapper]

Imagine this fight with your mother! I was living with my parents when we adopted Nicki as a family. But over the years, she became MINE... I walked, fed, cared for her... all vet bills were paid by me. When I was to get married, mom and I had the biggest fight over Nicki! She eventually left Nicki go - but only after she realized that Nicki was too much dog to care for alone! LOL.

So I take Nicki for custodial visits every once in a while and whenever the family visits her house, Nicki must come too! I laugh because it was my mom, and I can't imagine going through a divorce fighting over a pet... it was tense and stressful with my mom, whom I love dearly! Can you imagine the stress with someone you no longer love?

[catland]

Fortunately I've married a keeper so I don't have to even think of this. Also, the cats have made the decision for us anyway.

Jan is his little girl. Sid is my boy, and Joxer likes both of us but Jan hates him so he would be my guy with visitation rights because he's such a sweetie