I saw this on another forum I am a member of and thought I would share it with you all.
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My wife wanted a dog...I didn’t. She kept dropping hints and making remarks about ALL the things that I get that I want but all she wants is a dog...and I won’t agree. So, finally I give in and we go looking for a good breeder. However, we first establish some ground rules for the dog. The following is a chronological order of what happened next:
Day 1, 10:00 am
The dog is never permitted in the house. The dog stays outside in a specially built wooden compartment named for very good reason, the doghouse.
Day 1, 10:05 am
Okay, the dog can enter the house, but only for short visits or if her own house is under renovation.
Day 1, 10:35 am
Okay, since it’s cold outside, the dog can stay in the house on a permanent basis, provided her doghouse can be sold in a yard sale to a rookie dog owner. However, inside the house, the dog is not allowed to run free and is confined to a comfortable but secure metal cage.
Day 1, 11:15 am
Okay, the cage becomes part of a two-for-one deal along with the doghouse in the yard sale, and the dog can go wherever the heck she pleases. However, the dog is never allowed on the furniture.
Day 1, 11:18 am
Okay, the dog can get on the old furniture but not the new furniture.
Day 1, 11:21 am
Okay, the dog can get up on the new furniture until it looks like the old furniture and then we'll sell the whole works and buy new furniture...upon which the dog will most definitely not be allowed.
Day 1, 10:35 pm
The dog never sleeps on the bed. Period.
Day 1, 10:45 pm
Okay, the dog can sleep at the foot of the bed.
Day 1, 10:57 pm
Okay, the dog can sleep alongside you, but she's not allowed under the covers.
Day 1, 11:05 pm
Okay, the dog can sleep under the covers but not with her head on the pillow.
Day 1, 11:20 pm
Okay, the dog can sleep alongside you under the covers with her head on the pillow, but if she snores she's got to leave the room.
Day 1, 11:55 pm
Okay, the dog can sleep and snore and have nightmares in bed, but she's not to come in and sleep on the couch in the TV room, where I'm now sleeping. That's just not fair!
Day 190, 8:08 am
The dog is lonely and needs a playmate. We need to get another dog. Go to Day 1, 10:00 am for what happens next.
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