Gonna be an EXPENSIVE new year!

[catnapper]

But we are more than happy to spend the money....

Ashley is moving out!!!!!!!! You have NO IDEA how many happy jigs we're all doing.

We are giving her all the furniture inthe living room and dining room (excluding my new livingroom tables from Christmas last year and the tv) We're giving her all the pots, pans, utensils, glasses, and the old plate set that we replaced this summer. I spent a fortune on Faberware yesterday but it was so freeing to buy it! We're giving her the bathroom towels, any bedding she wants. We want her out and don't want her claiming we denied her anything or didn't help her.

We already got a price for a new sectional and chair at work (thank goodness I work in a furniture store ) and I'm placing the order tonight. We might live on lawn chairs til I can pay it off, but its something we've wanted for a loooong time but didn't get because of Ashley.

In the meantime, she's being a royally ungreatful brat. She wants upscale apartments with pools and turns her nose up at the ones she can actually afford. She'll learn fast enough the hard way.

She is blaming me for EVERYTHING that is miserable in her life. ME?!?! Somehow, I'm the bad person. I guess its easier to blame the wicked step mother than realize your misery is of your own making. Its so ironic to hear her tell her story to strangers -- she sincerely thinks of herself as Cinderella who does all this work while the wicked step mother points her fingers.

Ah... thats why I go to therapy every week. Therapy has been the BEST thing for us. It opened hubby's eyes to how crazy our house has been. We've been living in such utter chaos for so long, he had no idea how truly disfunctional it was because it was his "normal". He's now seen it and is making her move out. She's furious because she wanted to move out, but we told her to do it before she could punish us by storming out on her own.

Anyway, its going to be an expensive new year, but it'll be the best money we've ever spent!

[shais_mom]

that's great but PLEASE tell me she isn't moving in with the creepy gun guy. Is Cam staying with you?

[krazyaboutkatz]

This is great news!!! Hopefully she'll find the perfect place that she can afford so that she won't end up having to move back in with you. I'm assuming that Cam will stay with you.

[moosmom]

WOOHOO!!!! I'M doing a happy jig for ya honey!! She's in denial and in for a rude awakening if she thinks that apartment living is going to be like something out of the movies. Especially strapped with a toddler. And yeah, I hope she's not moving in with the gun enthusiast.

I'm glad Grant has finally opened his eyes. THAT in itself is a great Christmas gift.

[moosmom]

QUICK, change the locks!!!

[catnapper]

We have no idea if she's intending on moving in with the gun guy.... but we'd be surprised if she didn't. They want to get married and I am betting she'll get a ring for Christmas.

My son came to us last night saying the boyfriend talked to him last night and admitted that he is afraid of my husband. Afraid. Does he realize my husband is the biggest pushover in the world? I would love to know the story Ashley's told him about us.

As for Cameron, because of the hours she works, and the reality of babysitting, he'll be living here 5 days a week. She works til 11:00 at night so she'd be stupid to come pick him up at 11:30. Then again, she IS stupid so we shouldn't be surprised if she shows up every night to get him.

[kuhio98]

Kim ~ I am so happy for you all.

I hate to inject a little bit of negative in this, but to be on the safe side, get a plan that you and Grant agree on for if/when she can't make a go of it and wants to move back home. You and Grant need to be on the same page on that one -- and how you will handle her using Cameron as a bargaining chip. Don't let her work you guys against each other.

[catnapper]

Kim ~ I am so happy for you all.

I hate to inject a little bit of negative in this, but to be on the safe side, get a plan that you and Grant agree on for if/when she can't make a go of it and wants to move back home. You and Grant need to be on the same page on that one -- and how you will handle her using Cameron as a bargaining chip. Don't let her work you guys against each other.

Trust me, she is NOT going to move back in. Once she's out, she's not coming back. I had a therapy session again today and both my therapist and hubby's therapist agree she's borderline personality. They insist the best way to deal with people with that diagnosis is to not fight with them, not feed into their crap. You need to lay it on the line, "this is how its going to be, and if you don't like it, tough." and then don't argue or get involved in a war of words because we won't win. We just have to grow a thick skin and force ourselves to not care anymore because she's incapable of caring herself. Sounds awful and mean, but its just the way you have to be in order to save your own sanity when a Borderline Personality is in your life. We've been SO much happier since we've been looking at things this way.

[ramanth]

Happy for you!

[moosmom]

Kuhio,

AMEN!!! You are a very wise woman!!