nonstop crying at night!

[d_ciao]

my dog cries nonstop all night long. shes a 4 month old bichon poodle, we got her last week. how long will this last for? and what can i do? we've just been letting her cry and not going down to see her. we dont want her to think that if she just cries, then someone will come. we want her to be able to be okay with being by herself. her area has a doggy bed, a nightlight, toys, and her tray to pee/poo on. (as i type, it's 10:40 pm and she just knocked down her gate after jumping up on it a million times while crying real loud)

WHAT DO I DO? i haven't slept for 3 nights!!!

[Catty1]

I'm not a dog person, but I have read a few ideas over the years. Just suggestions:

1. Ask the breeder for advice.

2. If you put her in her kennel and then go right up to bed - try putting her in a few minutes before you leave, so she sees you around for a bit. Otherwise, she might think being in her kennel means she is alone. Can you put her in for short periods during the day when someone is around?

3. Heating pad or one of those grain bags that you heat in the microwave...wrap it well and hopefully she will find some comfort in it...missing the body heat of her fur-family is a big change for her.

4. I don't know where you get one these days - but I have heard that a clock with a loud ticking, well wrapped, will remind a puppy of a heartbeat.

5. I know she is a puppy! - but see if she can get a good run, chasing a stick - some exercise before bedtime. The idea is to tire her out...but she IS a puppy!

Good luck - I know you will get great advice from the dog people here. I just wanted to help you too!

[WELOVESPUPPIES]

Oh the old familiar puppy crying through the night. Well as you can see below, in my siggy, I have a chihuahua pup named Chopper. He is now almost five months old. We decided when we brought him home to just keep him closed in the bathroom at night with his toys, food, water, potty box and kennel with the door open(we worried about hypoglycemia as he was only 1.3 pounds so I was afraid to crate him at first without food). The first night he was home he was as quiet as a mouse. For the next week to ten days he about barked his little head off. We did the same thing, ignored him, hoping he would realize his cries did not get him attention. He literally cried all night long. You know it is bad when you say to your son, 'I came in and took Chopper out of the bathroom when he started barking this morning' and my son said, 'started, he never stopped'. Finally we decided to put him in his little kennel on the floor next to our bed and the other dogs beds. He has slept quietly ever since. He just wanted to be in the same room as everyone else. He even gets in his kennel all on his own when told it is bed time and goes right to sleep, not even a peep. Where is your puppy being kept? Is she in a kennel? I would just try bringing her in the same room as you. I think they just like to know we are close by and I think closing the kennel door made him feel safer. I hope this helps. Good luck.

[KittyGurl]

If your dog isn't kept in a crate, then you should buy one. Every time you go out (even if you are going to be out of a minute) or going to bed, you should put her in the crate. If he barks, completely ignore her. Do you go check on her while she is barking at night? If you do, this is attention to your dog so she will think everytime she barks you will come down and give her attention. Another idea is tire her out before you go to play. Take her on a long walk around the neighborhood or in the park. Play with her. When you do this, she will most likely sleep instead of bark all night. Good luck and keep us updated!

[d_ciao]

a crate isn't the same thing as a cage, right?

we don't check on her when she cries at night for the exact reason that you stated, but she's been crying like that for a week now... it's really bad.

i wouldn't mind putting her in a crate in my room, but
1. my room is real small
2. i'm going back to school in about a month
3. what will she do when she needs to go potty?

right now, we keep her in the area near the front door, we fenced it off 'cause there's tile floors there.

she's in there as i type, and she still cries even when she sees me, she wants to be let out! but we're trying to train her so that she'll be okay when there's no one home.

this is really depressing

[KittyGurl]

A crate and a cage are the same thing.

All dogs hate to be left alone by their family. But all show it in a different way. Your dog cries when it is left alone. Maybe when you go back to school, maybe someone can watch her for a couple hours like a neighbor or a family member so your dog isn't alone all day.

[Canis-Lupess]

I would definitely not allow her to sleep in your room with you to keep her quiet. She NEEDS to learn how to spend time on her own and allowing her to be with you all the time will just cause seperation anxiety because they never learn how to cope with spending time on their own. There will always be times when they need to be left alone for some time if you have to go somewhere and if they haven't had a chance to learn how to be alone...these times will be very distressing and thats when the symptoms of seperation anxiety set in.
It might help to make sure she spends some time on her own in the day too. Even when you are at home, make her spend a little time in another room. If she's allowed to stay with you ALL day, no wonder she suddenly feels all alone when night comes and it's harder for her to deal with then.

Some pups can be a bit stubborn when it comes to learning how to quieten down but they do eventually. Maybe provide a toy that keeps the dog occupied for a while that has some food in it for example that takes time to get out.

I agree about trying to tire her out before bed time.

Saying all this, it is never good if a dog is left alone too much and only sees you in the morning and then is left in the house all day until the evening etc...
When you go back to school, make sure she does still get adequate human contact during daylight hours although they don't need to be there the whole time.

[d_ciao]

i'm at home right now, and she's in her little fenced off area. she's crying even though she can see me. i know she wants out, but we can't really allow it right now. she cries even worse when i go into another room where she can't see me... it seems to be inevitable should i just leave her be? the crying's getting worse as i type.

[boricuajenny5]

I had this fight with my Cockapoo and honestly, she won. I live in a duplex and she was only 2 months old when I got her. I bought her from a run down pet shop who kept her in a crate day and night. I guess this gave her the impression that creates were bad because she never liked it at my house. She cried and cried for hours at a time. I was afraid she would wake up the landlord and I would have to get rid of her. I had the crate by my bed where should could even lick my hand if she needed to know i was there. I took a couple of days off from work just to help her with the crying and spend more time in her crate while I was home but nothing worked. Since she was small (and stayed small) I decided to let her have her way and sleep with me. Its not the best thing to do but it worked for me and I really dont mind since I only have 1 small dog. She sleeps calmly with me every night and doesnt bother any more. She is almost 2 years old now. She does alot better without being caged in when I am gone too which I do not recommend unless you can stay on top of EVERYTHING and make sure there isnt anything around that your puppy could chew. I tried putting a gate in the kitchen doorway but she managed to jump over it then crawl underneath when I put it higher. Maybe its in poodles to crave so much attention?

[Canis-Lupess]

Even if you don't go to her, make sure you don't speak to her or pay her attention when she cries...even from over the other side of the room. Some time should be spent with her in one room and you in another out of sight although not all the time.
If she cries louder, it's obvious that she's having a hard time being left alone at the moment but allowing her to be with you all the time would just make that even worse because there is bound to come times where it is impossible to not leave her on her own...and I can't imagine you wanting that being as she sounds pretty vocal as it is. With full on seperation anxiety, it's not just the noise, it's also the destroying of anything they can get hold of and defecating all over the place...not so much because they need the loo but out of pure stress.

The breeders may have played a part in it if they reared the pups in the house and always had somebody there with them and they were never left in a room on their own. With seperation anxiety, it is usually the presence of people that matter...not other dogs.

When we have had pups or taken one of our own pups from the litter, they've all been pretty good and may only whine a few times whilst they still hear you moving around but then quieten down for the night. My sisters Border collie pup was good like this too. He slept in the kitchen at first and then moved to the outhouse at night but that was partly his own choice....he went out there and wanted to stop so they put his bed in there and now he has a dog flap to get into the garden. Making as much racket as yours doesn't happen with most pups as people often believe.

Still, creating a routine might help. Dogs like routine. If you tire her out during the times she's allowed out of her pen, she'll more likely sleep once she's put away. Pups do need to sleep often so I can't imagine a young pup having the energy to cry non stop 24/7.
If she does ever spend time on her own without making a noise, even if it's only a few seconds, if you're there, go back in and give her plenty of praise and then up the amount of time gradually that she is required to stay silent. This helps reinforce their confidence at being left on their own. They realise you always come back and are happy and rewarding when you do.
Also, don't make too much fuss when you go to leave her. This reinforces the noisey behaviour. A cool departure and a warm return are what it's about.
With dogs that have seperation anxiety, you find it's the opposite...the owner knows the dog hates being left and that they destroy things so they make a lot of fuss, telling the dog to behave or trying to reassure it and then when they return and find another total mess, they get angry at the dog and so it's a warm departure and cool return....this just makes the whole behaviour worse.

[Catty1]

There is an excellent article on dealing with separation anxiety on the Cochrane Humane Society site:

http://www.cochranehumane.ca/html/resources/sepanx.htm

[WELOVESPUPPIES]

I don't believe that putting her in the room with you will increase seperation anxiety. We did what was best for OUR family, he slept, we slept and we built a routine. Play inside/outside from about 6 p.m. until 9:30(on and off of course) with potty breaks and feeding time. Then about 9:30 he settles down into my lap or his own dog bed which is in the same room we are. 10 p.m. all dogs go out to do their business and when we come in he goes straight to his crate and gets in it. Now I do not crate him when I leave the house. I have a very large masterbathroom that I put a puppy safe gate in the doorway of. I move his bed, food/water, toys, potty box etc into the bathroom and put the gate up. He does not cry when this is done and he also does not cry in his crate at night. I work out of the house and have for the past 12 years so all my dogs are around me 24 a day except for weekends when grocery shopping or errands need to be done. We have three dogs and none of them have seperation anxiety and this is how all three of them were brought up. All dogs are different and what works for one household might not work for another. I wish much luck in whatever you try, for you and your baby girl.

[Canis-Lupess]

Well, as CIAO stated, the bedroom is too small and he/she is going back to school in a month. What then?!?!?!?!

Let the pup get used to spending the night with them and then suddenly, they are off back to school and she's left all alone again and totally not used to spending the night alone.

There is no reason why any dog shouldn't be able to get used to spending the night in it's own space.

All the dozens of dogs we've had have never slept with us and they haven't had a problem with that.
Also, it is well known that dogs who are allowed to spend too much time with their owners are more likely to get seperation anxiety. No point in doing something that could cause this and waiting for it to develop and then have to try and reverse it afterwards.

John Fisher used to always ask these questions to owners who's dogs had seperation anxiety:

Does the dog follow you from room to room?
Does it sleep in the bedroom?
Does it try and get into the loo with you?
Does it scratch or cry and howl when doors are accidentally shut on it?
Is it always flopped down at your feet whenever you sit down, usually with one paw over your feet, or does it insist on sitting on your lap?

He asked these questions for a reason. He commented that if the answer to any of these was correct, then he knew it was an over-attached relationship and the dog can't stand to be left on it's own.

He goes on to say: Obviously, if the dog cannot be left in a room on it's own when the owner is in the house, there is no chance of leaving in the house on it's own. Significantly more time should be spent with the dog in one room and the owner in another - starting with periods of time that can be counted in seconds, leading to far longer periods, to the point where the dog can be shut out of the bedroom at night without it causing a problem.

Funny how he commented so much about dogs with seperation anxiety sleeping in the bedroom with their owners.

[lizbud]

I may be wrong here, but it sounds like the pup is in the fenced in area
a lot. Why? Does this only happen at night or the whole day? How would
you describe a typical day for the pup? The pup at 4mos shold be learning
to do it's potty business outside.

[WELOVESPUPPIES]

Well, as CIAO stated, the bedroom is too small and he/she is going back to school in a month. What then?!?!?!?!

Let the pup get used to spending the night with them and then suddenly, they are off back to school and she's left all alone again and totally not used to spending the night alone.

Funny how he commented so much about dogs with seperation anxiety sleeping in the bedroom with their owners.

Understandable if the bedroom is too small, but the pup would only need a small crate, what could it weigh at 4 months 5-6 pounds.

I never got the impression d_ciao was going away to school, just back to school. d_ciao, are you going to college where you are leaving the home?

It is funny how one of the comments was "does your dog follow you room to room" when I have read on several threads on this site and others about people being told to teather their new puppy to them while in the house so they know they are not getting into things and so they know when the pup has to go to the bathroom. That is teaching a dog to follow you throughout the house. So you see there are many methods out there to get your pup to be the dog you want it to be, it just has to work for the family owning the pet. And yes we will sometimes disagree on that method but everyone on this site is entitled to their own opinion on things, that does not make one right and one wrong. What works for one home and their pets may not work for someone else. I am just explaining what WORKED FOR OUR HOUSEHOLD. Does it make it the right thing? Maybe not, but I am not going to sit here and be told that my dogs should not sleep in my room because I am going to create seperation anxiety. Duke has been raised this way since the day he came home(almost seven years ago). All my life our dogs have slept in someones room and we have never experienced a dog with seperation anxiety. Were we just lucky? Maybe. But three out of three here and absolutely no problems.

d-ciao, whatever you chose to do is something that has to work for all of you in your household, puppy included. I know there is a PTer on here, petpsychologist, who always offers good advise and maybe other solutions than what have been brought up here. Good luck.