15 minutes past midnight

[momoffuzzyfaces]

15 minutes past midnight tonight (it will be the 27th then), it will be the 8 years since my father passed. I miss him like it was yesterday.

Most days, I can accept he is happier now. That he hated being in the nursing home and was ready and even wanting to go. But I miss him.

Even with Alzheimer's he always knew who I was. They said he couldn't remember things but he was still smart enought to get out of the Alzheimer's secure unit - twice!

Most days, I'm ok with my life. I even can handle the pain from my arthritis and fibromyalgia most times. But tonight, the pain in my heart is lots worse than the pain in my body. Just want to say; I miss him.

[Kalei]

Oh I'm so sorry. That must be so hard. The pain in your heart shows how much you cared and loved him and I'm sure your father wouldn't want you to feel so down and lonely. I'm sure he would want you to know that no matter what he is still there with you in your heart, and he runs through your blood.

Maybe if you prayed to your father, God would be kind in his wisdom and send the prayer over to your father to hear

[moosmom]

MOFF,

I'm sorry about your Dad. It'll be 10 years this August that my Dad's been gone.

Hang in there. Remember all the good times you and your Dad had. It'll keep his memory alive.

(((((((HUGS)))))))

Donna

[caseysmom]

I am so sorry, its been almost 11 years since my father died, he also had Alzheimers...he also almost busted out of a few places near the end. What a sad disease.

[Dorothy39]

It's my turn to reply on your thread Moff~

I watched my Father die in a Hospital bed, on August 17th, 1995 ~

But he didn't really leave me on that day after all, ~ He simply left his body, just before he left his legacy upon my soul , as I held him for a brief moment that day~ and , I whispered into his ear, all that I learned I told him that he was a Wonderful Father~


He gave me his gift, when he took his last breath~ and I now share his gift with so many people !!!!!

Talk about a Blessing!!!!!! I had a Wonderful Father !!!

{{{HUGS}} are here for you Moff!!!!

[gini]

Isn't it interesting - I cannot even remember what I did yesterday, but I can recall the morning of my father's passing and the events the led up to it in a crystal clear way.

I am just grateful that I could do so many little things for my Dad before he left us - and that I had the chance to tell him how much I loved him and appreciated all that he had done.

Moff, I would think that your Dad would not want you to be sad. He is in such a better place now - pain and illness free - just waiting for you someday.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Thanks everyone! I'm better today. I know he really left 4 years before he really died. When my step mom put him in the nursing home, was when he really started leaving. Looking back at how he hated being in that place and how he hated being the way he was, I know he's happier now. He's probably fishing with all my kin there!!!

I think what did me in this year is this is the first year I haven't been able to get to the cemetery to put flowers on his grave. Having no car really really stinks!!!

I will make it out there for Memorial Day one way or the other!!!

[Randi]

I'm sorry you're feeling down, MOFF. I know what it's like to loose your closest family, I have lost both my parents. The pain gets lesser as the years go by, but some days I really miss them, they were good people! I think it was a comfort that I were there for them until the end. My dad had his sense of humour intact and used to say: The day I start drinking tea and stop smoking, I'm really sick and will probably die! My mom turned out to be a lot stronger in her last months than I had expected.

As you know, I lost John two years ago, and that is still very real. I miss him terribly - I can't express how much. I'm glad that you and other PTalkers got to know a little bit of him, and liked him. That comforts me too in some way. He is only 3-4 min. away from where I live and I choose to believe he's with me in spirit, and I go to visit quite often.

(((((hugs))))) ...... and cheer up!

[Kfamr]

I was in bed 15 minutes past midnight, but I made sure to keep you and your father in my thoughts. I hope he and my grandmother have become friends and are fishing together, because I know she liked to fish as well.