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Thread: "Chocolate is a Vegetable"

  1. #1
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    "Chocolate is a Vegetable"

    In honor of borzoimom getting her surgical staples removed http://petoftheday.com/talk/showthread.php?t=119534 -
    this has been in my e-mail box a couple of times and never fails to give me a smile, so I thought I would share it with my Pet Talk friends. On a more serious note I've also read that dark chocolate (but not milk chocolate) contains anti-oxidants, which have health benefits.

    Here goes. "Chocolate is a Vegetable", author unknown.

    Chocolate is a Vegetable: Chocolate is derived from cocoa beans.
    Bean = vegetable.

    Sugar is derived from either sugar CANE or sugar BEETS. Both are plants, which places them in the vegetable category. Thus, chocolate is a vegetable.

    To go one step further, chocolate candy bars also contain milk, which is dairy. So candy bars are a health food.

    Chocolate-covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

    If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

    If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves. (This theory is being tested with other snack foods as well.)

    The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

    Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite, and you'll eat less.

    If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

    Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

    Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

    If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated. You can't let that happen, can you?

    A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Now, isn't that handy?

    REMEMBER: "Stressed" spelled backward is "desserts".
    Praying for peace in the Middle East, Ukraine, and around the world.

    I've been Boo'd ... right off the stage!

    Aaahh, I have been defrosted! Thank you, Bonny and Asiel!
    Brrrr, I've been Frosted! Thank you, Asiel and Pomtzu!


    "That's the power of kittens (and puppies too, of course): They can reduce us to quivering masses of Jell-O in about two seconds flat and make us like it. Good thing they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd surely have taken over the world by now." -- Paul Lukas

    "We consume our tomorrows fretting about our yesterdays." -- Persius, first century Roman poet

    Cassie's Catster page: http://www.catster.com/cats/448678

  2. #2
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    yum... Thanks for posting this, remind me to show it to my mom.
    STILL AVAILABLE BY E-MAIL

  3. #3
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    OMG too funny and I love it! May I copy it? would love to send that to MIL who is a fudgeaholic!

  4. #4
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    well I think after all, I DO LOVE and EAT my veggies!!!........LOL
    Corinna´s Christmas Card Swap ´06
    dedicated to a lovely woman who won many hearts along her life...........
    she will be deeply missed.......Thank you for letting us be a part of your life, you will surely remain in ours FOREVER........R.I.P. Dear Corinna

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    dedicated to the kindest,loveliest and always helpful dude that one would be honored and proud to know........R.I.P. Dear Phred



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  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.Goodnow
    OMG too funny and I love it! May I copy it? would love to send that to MIL who is a fudgeaholic!
    absolutely!
    Praying for peace in the Middle East, Ukraine, and around the world.

    I've been Boo'd ... right off the stage!

    Aaahh, I have been defrosted! Thank you, Bonny and Asiel!
    Brrrr, I've been Frosted! Thank you, Asiel and Pomtzu!


    "That's the power of kittens (and puppies too, of course): They can reduce us to quivering masses of Jell-O in about two seconds flat and make us like it. Good thing they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd surely have taken over the world by now." -- Paul Lukas

    "We consume our tomorrows fretting about our yesterdays." -- Persius, first century Roman poet

    Cassie's Catster page: http://www.catster.com/cats/448678

  6. #6
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    Thanks so much! she will love it!

  7. #7
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    Roflmbo!!

    ( OUCH!) lol.. but true- I agree- I must agree- it does help! Chocolates all around... ( I get the dark cherries- .. lol..)

  8. #8
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    LOL! I love it! Farewell, guilt!

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