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Thread: To:God From:The Dog

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2005
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    Oklahoma
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    To:God From:The Dog

    Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

    Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

    Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?

    Dear God: If a! dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

    Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

    Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

    Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Up North. Where all your troubles freeze and fall off.
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    You're missing the end , which is the best parts lol
    STILL AVAILABLE BY E-MAIL

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2005
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    am I?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Virginia US
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    sumbirdy- I am realllllllllly enjoying your posts !!!! Thank you as I have a big smile on my face..

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    hurricane central USA
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    81
    Quote Originally Posted by sumbirdy
    Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

    Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

    Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?

    Dear God: If a! dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

    Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

    Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

    Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?


    QUOTE :You're missing the end , which is the best parts lol QUOTE


    HERE'S the rest of it

    Dear God, If we come back as humans, is that good, or bad?

    Dear God, When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands to get in?

    Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember - to be a good dog.

    1. I will not eat the cats’ food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

    2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell

    2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

    3. The sofa is not a ‘face towel’.. neither are laps.

    4. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

    5. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

    6. I will not bite the officer’s hand when he reaches in for Mom’s driver’s license and registration.

    7. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad’s underwear when he’s on the toilet

    8. I don’t need to suddenly stand straight up when I’m under the coffee table.

    9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

    10. I will not throw up in the car

    11. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

    12. The cat is not a ’squeaky toy’ so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it’s usually not a good thing.

    And, finally, my last question:

    Dear God: When I get to Heaven, may I have my testicles back?
    I HAVE BEEN FROSTED !!!

    http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/tpc/ERA_110806_ARS

    Click daily

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Virginia US
    Posts
    5,036
    roofffffflllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll ll...

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Middle TN, United States
    Posts
    8,319
    Rofl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Thank You, kittycats_delight for my new siggy!!!

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