Megan,

First of all you are not wasting space by writing here. We are here to listen and help. I wish had someone or someplace to talk with when I was growing up. My mother and I definitely had a "stormy" relationship (including trying to push me down the stairs once). I left home at 17 (once I graduated high school) and never moved back. There was a period of about 6 years where we never even spoke.

I realized that this was effecting my adult life and I went to talk with a therapist (the best thing I could do). It made me realize that it wasn't ME, but rather my mother had her own problems and I couldn't fix them. All I could control was my reaction to her.

I think that everyone's advice about talking with a counselor or even a minister, is good.

Remember, we are here if you need to vent...