I know how you feel...my cat Joker is the most socialble freindly cat to all people and animals...but, he doesn't like to be picked up, will NOT sit/sleep on your lap. he likes things on his own terms. He will sleep only on the end of my bed...but you can't go put your head next to him or he leaves!! I feel like I'm constantly trying to win his affection...but I realizzed after a year that this is just the way he is. When you don't obide by his rules, he will attack you!! and when you pull him off with all you might after losing some skin, he actually runs after you and pounces on to attack again. At first it was really creepy, but after a while you learn this Jeckell and Hyde cat is just a king who likes it his way. When he is in a good mood, he wants to be pet or fed or playyed with. Thank God for water pistols!!!!