Kirsten I share everyone's sentiments here , and agree it is very dis-respectful of him to be in your home and not respect your wishes, what a rude man indeed.

It is a pity your mum cannot see that he is dis-respecting you, she should at least see that.

You have my full empathy, I have no answers to your problem, and I am sorry you are being upset, at a time when you least need it, after your surgery , you need some nice TLC and it saddens me to hear this. HUGS .