Thank you everyone, for all your kind words. Today has proven to be just so hard for me.

I had made an appointment for Bassett for tomorrow morning. I had noticed some strange behaviour, like sitting funny, hiding, and basically just looking ill. When I got up this morning, she didn't really *look* all that different. I had to run an errand first thing but when I got home, she looked bad. She took three steps toward me and had to stop and open mouth breathe. I decided I would call my vet. I stood to go make the call, when Bassett rolled onto her side and squeaked at me, like she was being pinched. I called my vet and she said Bassett should go to emergency.

All the way there, Bassett panted and squeaked. I begged her not to die in the car and I tried to get there as fast as I could. I rushed in and they took her from me right away (I had called ahead) and I filled out some info and waited for the vet. She came in and told me that they would be trying an xray, or just doing an exploratory tap in her chest. They got an xray alright, but the vet came in after the xray and said "we've run into a little trouble with the tap. Her heart stopped beating. We were able to bring it back, and she technically has a heartbeat right now.." and I just said I wanted to see her. I went into the room and they had her on the table. The technician was listening to her chest, looked at the vet and shook her head. The vet said to me, "Her heart has stopped beating again, so I'll start CPR." I just shook my head and said "No.. let her go. She's had enough." They pulled the tube out and let me have a few moments with her. I coudln't justify bringing her back just to have them have to do the rest of the tap and have her suffer more. It wasn't fair. As much as I miss her, and oh GOD do I miss her, it would have been cruel of me to bring her back when she was already on her way to a place of peace.

I had asked God for clarity. I told Him that the answer had to be clear, because I didn't want to have to worry if my decision would make her suffer. The fact that Bassett passed on her own, while I stroked her head, is enough of an answer for me. It was time for her to go. I asked them if I could clip some of her fur, which I did, and I got her collar. I didn't want to keep her ashes, but they did make an impression of her paw print for me baked in clay, which I will put in a shadowbox frame with her fur, collar and a picture.

If I had to go back and do it all over again, I would do the same thing. I have no regrets. Up until the past 4-5days, Bassett has been a happy, healthy kitty. Even this morning, she hadn't lost her spirit.. she was hissing at Nutmeg and still headbumping me on my feet and my hands. She was Bassett, through and through, right until the end. I'm comforted that she really didn't know how very sick she was.

Thank you all, so much. You are all great comforts.

Naomi