When I became pregnant with Jaden, I was totally irresponsible. I never wanted to have kids and I was totally unprepared. By the grace of God, Jaden changed my life. I am a wonderful mother and I love Jaden more then anything. I couldn't imagine life without children now.

On the other hand, I have a friend who is a wonderful person. She became pregnant by accident. She had one abortion before, and decided that wasn't for her. She wanted to give the baby up for adoption. I was pregnant at the same time, we had the same due dates and I wound up losing the baby. When that happened, I was so devastated. My friend begged me to adopt her baby. I told her no and convinced her that she would love her baby and the maternal instincts would kick in when he was born. Well, I am sad to say that he's over a year old now and her maternal instincts still haven't kicked in. She doesn't abuse him, but he isn't really loved either. She's just not cut out to be a mom.

I feel so guilty because I'm kind of the one that convinced her to give motherhood a shot. From this experience, I've realized that not everyone is cut out to be parents. It isn't like this girl is a loser or cold hearted person...she just simply isn't maternal.

She's still begging me to adopt her son, and now he's so much older. I wish I'd done it when he was a newborn. Mike and I've been talking about it alot. It's a big and scary decision.