Thank you all, yes I agree it is best to tell her the truth, my main concern was I donot know what the little girl herself knows about her illness, has she been told the truth, and also as the other mother was not telling her child everything, that melissa would tell her.

Any way she returned from the party, which turned out not to be a party really, just lots of relatives and melissa and this other girl, Daphne is the little girl with the cancer, she told them she had a brain tumour and was on medicene now and might be returning to school, and that she had been to Disneyland and on our NZ IDOL show.

I discussed it with Melissa, she seemed to think that because they had caught it early Daphne would be ok, so I told her that with cancer there are no guarantees, and that it could come back, or that she might not have a long life, I think that was the best way I could put it, Melissa has experienced her grandmothers death of cancer, so has a some understanding.

The thing my daugher was really bothered about, was the other girl with her, kept saying on the way home how lucky Daphne was to go to Disneyland etc etc, and moaned how lucky she was, my daughter was upset with her for being like that, and said she was not being very nice, silly thing is the other girl has wealthy parents and goes to Fiji every year, her mother's home country, and has all the latest toys and is really quite spoilt, but I guess thats kids for ya.

I really appreciate all your inputs, especially from the young ones, as you know how it feels to be left out of things,parents sometimes do the wrong thing, thinking they are protecting you, but in the end it hurts more that way, that was exactly how I felt, if I did not prepare her and she passed away, then she would be angry with me.