OK - a little of the disenting view here.

First, why does your husband not want another kitty? The expense? The hassle? The space? I think its important to know because you are asking him to make a possible 15-20 year commitment and he should have some say in the issue. Is he concerned that you'll spend more time with the kitty and less time with him?

With that in mind, fostering might be a good alternative, providing you allow him to have a say once the kitty adjusts to your household.

As wonderful as that kitty is, and I know this is going to sound a little harsh, its much easier to find a new pet than it is to find a new husband.

Finally, I'm sorry to hear about your mother. It starts to get scary as our parent's health starts to fail.