I really need some help/advice

[neko1]

I think the gift is beautiful. We also got everyone's gifts at things remembered. My best friend loved her gift and more importantly, she was just honored to be a part of our special day. That is the most important thing.



(OMG I can't believe I've been married for almost 6 months now!!! )

[PayItForward]

Originally posted by Samantha Puppy
Thanks for your thoughts/advice everyone. My fiancee intervened and suggested that she and I take a good bit of time apart to cool down and maybe we can discuss this better when we're not angry and emotional.

I don't know what her deal is/was and since I have less than zero desire to talk to her at the moment, it'll be awhile longer before I find out why she went off the deep end, but when I do I'll update you all.

I would wonder at the value of a friendship, when she managed to move the spotlight from you (i.e. bride to be) to herself.

This shows how selfish she is being, she is not thinking about you !

I broke friends with a girl I had known for 24 years since I was 5 years old. Had we met in adulthood, we would never have been friends, as we were very different people. I thought we respected each others life choices, how wrong was I.

One day she decided to educate me on how horrible SHE thinks my life partner is and how SHE thinks I should spilt up with him etc etc.

Given the choice I choose him and to this day I regret nothing.

You will always find people who think they know how to run YOUR life better than YOU can ?!?

But it is YOUR life and it is up to you how you get married and what gifts are chosen, it is nothing to do with her.

You may never find out why she went of the deep end and does it matter anyway. Sometimes people just grow apart and it takes an argument to show you how different people can be.

Don't forget, if she doesn't want your gifts etc, I am sure you can announced a different Maid of Honor and uninvite Christine from your wedding.

Have a great day on your wedding

PS. I think that is a lovely gift and it looks more expensive than you stated, I had guessed it was priced around £20 minimum ($35) not that the price matters but I think they look very stylish.

[lynnestankard]

I wonder why she's so upset about the cost of the gift?
As almost everyone else has said I assumed that being asked to be a bridesmaid was a great honour - I can remember the days (over here in the UK) when bridesmaids would buy their own dresses or pay to have them made and not receive any gift at all, or even expect a gift! It was just the taking part with a very good friend on a very special day that meant everything.

I think the gifts you've chosen are beautiful and why she would get so upset I found quite peculiar.

Perhaps after some time apart the dust may settle a little and enable you to find out what she actually expected as a present. Maybe she had her heart set on something. Clutching at staws here! I just feel the thing is so sad - you must feel so let down.
{{{Hugs}}}

Lynne

[Samantha Puppy]

Originally posted by lynnestankard
I just feel the thing is so sad - you must feel so let down.
{{{Hugs}}}

Thanks Lynne... I think that's probably the point that I'm at right now. I was confused. Then [really, really, really, really] mad. Now I really do feel let down.

Every other one of my bridesmaids said that they never would expect a gift and if I did give them one, that they would never be disappointed in anything I'd chosen because they were just happy and honored to take part in my wedding day. So they're all really helping at the moment, which is nice.

I think lots of time apart (well, she's already in Florida and I'm in Maryland, but we corresponded a lot) is in order. A lot. Which sucks because she'll be up here for Christmas and being as she's 1,000 miles away during the rest of the year, I really look forward to seeing her around the holidays. I don't want to see her right now, but I also don't want to miss the opportunity of having her around.

[Kfamr]

She sounds very snobby and selfish. I agree with others, why would the price matter, when she gets the honor to be a part of a special moment in your life. Does money really mean that much? IMO, no, it doesn't.

P.S. .... If she doesn't want it, my initials are K.K.

[popcornbird]

I cannot believe your friend would do something like that! Complaining about a gift?!?! MY GOODNESS! That is ruder than anything I can imagine! Its your wedding, a happy time in YOUR life, and as a *friend*, SHE should be happy for you, and helpful, and considerate, and touched that you loved her enough to choose her as your bridesmaid. Does money really mean more to her than your friendship? This is just so sad and disturbing. I'm sorry you have to deal with such a person. I know that if any one of my friends ever did something like that, it would probably lead to a broken friendship.

BTW, I love the gift you chose and find it very odd that someone wouldn't like something like that!

[RICHARD]

at the risk of being talked about and called stupid.......


Why is there such a priority on things like brides maids gifts?

A true friend would overlook the the 'gift' and be happy for
the other person.

Friendship and sharing each other's special milestones is the
true measure of a friend.

A friend doesn't care, an aquaintance bitches about the stupidest things.

In the end you can count your friends on one hand-the rest you can count on one finger.



the middle one.

[Kfamr]

LMAO, Richard...... You're too much.

[Ally Cat's Mommy]

Originally posted by RICHARD


In the end you can count your friends on one hand-the rest you can count on one finger.



the middle one.

Richard, You make me laugh (even when I am having an awful day).

I agree with the others. It is such an honour to be asked to share in a special occasion such as a wedding. Your friend needs to "get over herself" and ask why she accepted the invitation in the first place - was it to enjoy the day with you, or in anticipation of a gift?

My husbands brother got married last year. He accepted the request to be best man even although it meant:
- PAYING for his own ticket to fly from Middle East to South Africa to be there (over $1000)
- MISSING my birthday (there was no way we could ALL fly back)
- paying for the Tux hire for everyone
- paying for his Mum's "Mother of the Groom" outfit
- buying them a washing machine

He NEVER mentioned any of the costs to his brother, as he didn't want to upset him, and he never received a gift in return. Is he upset??? NO!! Because HE made the decision to participate, so he could be there when his only sibling got married - and you can't put a monetary value on that!