Gosh Pay It Forward just wrote every thought that was in my mind! I too think that your brother may be suffering some emotional problems, maybe even clinical depression, and might need the help of a therapist to get through it but I doubt that, being the type of person he seems to be, would ever seek help. For now I would do exactly as PIF has so beautifully said....enjoy Christmas with your father and see what the future brings. Christmas and holidays in general are often very stressful. We are thrown into a room around a big table with lots of people who are "family" but who in many case we no longer have anything in common with.

Recently I became sort of reunited with my brother's wife after a 20 year separation. I won't give you the long boring story but she flew off the handle with me on the phone because I couldn't attend my nephew's graduation. Believe me it was ugly! Since after that I didn't feel very warm and fuzzy about her I fell out of touch, although saw my brother throughout this whole time. She has had many arguments with neighbors and friends over the years and my brother is well aware of her temper and never faulted me. Well, she was diagnosed about two years ago with incurable, inoperable cancer and began mending fences with people with whom she had long term disagreements and I was one of them. Unfortunately it took cancer to create the reunion that we had. Nevertheless, one can't cry over spilled milk. What's done is done and we move on and maybe learn from it in the process.

That said, I think at some point your brother may look back and feel badly about the way he has spoken to you and the way he has damaged your relationship. It may even take an illness (I hope not) to bring him to his senses. In the meantime I would try to maintain some type of communication, if only an occasional e-mail and remain as friendly and kind as is possible. This will at least "leave the door open" should he have a change of heart. (((hugs)))