Being a care giver can become over- whelming . You are so very obviously deeply attached to all your kitties as well. They will get better and you will find good homes and then you will have a much needed emotional and physical rest. Maybe your vet can help you find good homes for some of the kitties and as others have suggested joining up with a national rescue organization would help with the stress and worry of finding good , loving homes. Sending you all the postitive energy I can muster.