Marysmerrycats, there are some new drugs on the market for RA that work MUCH better than MTX (and without the side effects). It sounds like you are already seeing a rheumatologist, maybe you should ask about some of the new biologicals. I know that they are quite expensive, but it might be worth a try for you.

The knee replacement surgery may sound intmidating, but once you have it done you won't believe the difference in your life.

Unfortunately RA is generally an inherited condition, so your children may develop it or just carry the genetic code. I know that my maternal grandfather had it when he was alive and it now looks like my sister might have it also.