Groucho: HELP!!! Legal advice and representation needed!

[Catty1]

Gary, wouldn't that be Purry Mason?

[phesina]

Dear Groucho, no, the strange men did not check with us ahead of time about what they were going to do. In fact, Meowmie was told by the "management:" "We are going to do this, whether you like it or not, and if you object, you have seven days notice to find another place to live."

And we were not able to supervise. In fact, since the place was going to be full of loud noises and nasty smells and strange men going in and out the door, Meowmie decided she had to take us away.. the day before and then not bring us back until the day after. So two of us (Bob and the Princess) got to go stay with Aunties Mary Kay and Helen. The other three of us had to stay at a place called "Karnik Pet Lodge".. where we got shut in a strange little room so we spent most of the time in the backs of our carriers, two of us crowded in the back of one because Meowmie only left two of our carriers there.. and there were not only other cats there but also DOGS, and we had to smell all these strange smells and listen to BARKING day and night!

This is NOT acceptable. We hope we can sue the pants off the so-called "owners" and "managers" of our home, not only for physical upheaval but also for severe mental and emotional distress, and whatever else you can come up with in your research.

Thank you, Groucho!

[momcat]

Gary, wouldn't that be Purry Mason?

Hi Miss Catty1,
I like that Purry Mason thing. By the way, Meowmie is my dependable purralegal.

[momcat]

Okay fellow kitties, here's where we stand on your legal issues:

Poppy, Elmer, Bob, Sparkler, and Princess,
I'm sorry to say that we most likely will have to go to Cat Court. My research into your horrible situation clearly shows that you were all aboosed. What really put this over the top was that you had to leave YOUR home while all that work was being done. There still might be a chance of settling out of court, I'll know later this week and call you.

Cassie,
What's the story with the Chinese food? Has your Meowmie given you any of your favorite yet? Be sure to let me know. My idea right now is to set up a Chinese food calendar that will set specific dates for your treat. If that will work out, I don't see this having to go to Cat Court. We'll talk.

Hey Mac,
What's happening there, buddy? Have you had any sooshy lately? I talked to your Meowmie and she explained that it wasn't an oversight. Something happened with her car and it had to get fixed before she could get you some. You won't have to go to Cat Court on this one, it looks like we can work something out.

If you have any questions or more information, please call me. I'll be in touch.

Your friend,
Groucho the Lawyer
Practice Limited to Kitty Krimes and Aboose

[Pinot's Mom]

WAIT! I have a serious issue! Mom took my couches away! Is that allowed?

[cassiesmom]

WAIT! I have a serious issue! Mom took my couches away! Is that allowed?

Why did Mom take your couches, Pinot? Are you getting new couches? Or- are your couches being cleaned and brought back? Could you please have your people give you hugs for me?


Your admiring fan,
Elyse

[Don Juan's mom]

Groucho, our meowmie/step-meowmie has gotten a job at sumpin called a "fringe festival" and another job at a Halloween maze. It's bad enuf meowmie gone all weekdays workin for a hoomin lawyer, but now she's going to be gone nights as well! Meomie says we need munny, but we say if pawpie can stay home wif us she can too. Besides pawpie can't be our rest room attendant. At da very least she can bring us some fringe to play wif.

Don Juan, Zerlina, Rugger, and Remy

[Pinot's Mom]

Why did Mom take your couches, Pinot? Are you getting new couches? Or- are your couches being cleaned and brought back? Could you please have your people give you hugs for me?


Your admiring fan,
Elyse

Mom took my couches and put in New ones. I don't like the new ones as much but I'm learning to accept them. My life can be so traumatic.

[cassiesmom]

Mom took my couches and put in New ones. I don't like the new ones as much but I'm learning to accept them. My life can be so traumatic.

Pinot, do you get to snuggle with your people on the new couches? Cassie agrees with you that change is hard. We inherited a desk chair from my mom and dad and Cassie (temporarily) lost a hidey spot. She got it back when the old desk chair was picked up by the resale, but the problem is that I took *her* spot over while the chair was waiting to be picked up.

[cassiesmom]

Okay fellow kitties, here's where we stand on your legal issues:

Poppy, Elmer, Bob, Sparkler, and Princess,
I'm sorry to say that we most likely will have to go to Cat Court. My research into your horrible situation clearly shows that you were all aboosed. What really put this over the top was that you had to leave YOUR home while all that work was being done. There still might be a chance of settling out of court, I'll know later this week and call you.

Cassie,
What's the story with the Chinese food? Has your Meowmie given you any of your favorite yet? Be sure to let me know. My idea right now is to set up a Chinese food calendar that will set specific dates for your treat. If that will work out, I don't see this having to go to Cat Court. We'll talk.

Hey Mac,
What's happening there, buddy? Have you had any sooshy lately? I talked to your Meowmie and she explained that it wasn't an oversight. Something happened with her car and it had to get fixed before she could get you some. You won't have to go to Cat Court on this one, it looks like we can work something out.

If you have any questions or more information, please call me. I'll be in touch.

Your friend,
Groucho the Lawyer
Practice Limited to Kitty Krimes and Aboose

Not yet, Groucho. Meowm had one of those "koff" thingies again this week. She even missed work and stayed home with me, but she slept a lot and drank tea and orange juice. We had chicken noodle soup and she did give me some of the chicken from the soup. She said she had a fever and she was putting the stick thingy into her mouth and waiting for it to beep. She is still making the "koff" sound but not nearly as often or as bad. I am sure we will have Chinese restaurant food soon.

Lubz,
Cassie

[phesina]

Okay fellow kitties, here's where we stand on your legal issues:

Poppy, Elmer, Bob, Sparkler, and Princess,
I'm sorry to say that we most likely will have to go to Cat Court. My research into your horrible situation clearly shows that you were all aboosed. What really put this over the top was that you had to leave YOUR home while all that work was being done. There still might be a chance of settling out of court, I'll know later this week and call you.

Your friend,
Groucho the Lawyer
Practice Limited to Kitty Krimes and Aboose

And then, Groucho, when we got back home, we found things were all changed around and dusty, and there were strange smells, and there was a FLY flying around, which must have just had flittens (fly-kittens?) because now there are a bunch of them flying around. We were completely traumatized and are still recovering.

[momcat]

And then, Groucho, when we got back home, we found things were all changed around and dusty, and there were strange smells, and there was a FLY flying around, which must have just had flittens (fly-kittens?) because now there are a bunch of them flying around. We were completely traumatized and are still recovering.

Okay fellow kitties. This latest news has put me in what Meowmie calls the Popeye Syndrome - that's all I can stands, I can't stands no more! Those men allowing a fly and flittens into your house is dissing you to the extreme. You didn't invite them to come over and they won't play with us. Did they try to take your food or treats? Of course you were traumatized! This is most definitely going to Cat Court. I'll file the motion tomorrow.

Your friend,
Groucho the Lawyer
Practice Limited to Kitty Krimes and Aboose