Wedding Dilemma- What Would You Do?

[pomtzu]

My suggestion: invite her to the wedding as a guest, but not to be included in the wedding party.

My now DIL and my son had an issue when planning their wedding (2nd for both of them). DIL had no relationship for years with her father and step-mother and was adamant that they would not be invited. She despised her step-mother and did not want to be anywhere near her. Finally DIL's mother convinced her that she really should invite them as guests - afterall - it was her natural father and some day she might regret that she didn't extend the olive branch! As much as she didn't want to invite them, she finally relented and invited them, fully expecting that they would be a no show. Well, they did show. Everyone was civil to one another, and everything went off without a hitch, and a good time was had by all. Father and step-mother were guests only and sat with other guests and not at the head table, which worked out just fine.

This gesture did not lead to a renewed relationship tho, and several months later when DIL and son went to her father's place after a fire at the home - to see if they could be of any help - the wicked step-mother went ballistic on them and kicked them off the property. End of any relationship, and that was almost 6 years ago.

But at least DIL did the right thing by inviting them. No one can say she didn't try.


So good luck, and keep us posted as plans progress.

[Cataholic]

My suggestion: invite her to the wedding as a guest, but not to be included in the wedding party.

Yes, as much as I wouldn't want her in my wedding PARTY, there are many reasons to invite her as a guest.