Engagement ring?

[Lady's Human]

Engagement rings don't HAVE to be diamonds, and a family heirloom means more than the newest, shiniest diamond regardless.

Just because the diamond marketers say something doesn't make it so. The only thing that the "formula" of X months of income= the size diamond you buy guarantees is a fiancee who is deeply in debt.

[moosmom]

Absolutely, LH!!!

[carole]

i think it is a very sweet idea, however jewellery is very personal, and especially an engagement ring, i think i would let her choose her own, and if they cannot afford it right now ,so be it, i waited five years to get mine, we could not get one at the time, just a rather in expensive wedding band.

It also sounds like she has unique taste, and maybe would like something very simple and plain, just judging from your comments.

I see it quite differently than Karen and Donna, i would hate someone else's ring even if it did have sentimental value, i would feel i just had to accept it and wear it , even if i hated it,where it means something to you and your son, for her it might have very little meaning at all, just my opinion,and it is a pretty ring, but might not be to her taste.

so obviously my vote was let her choose her own.

[kaycountrygal]

hmmmm, good question! I see nothing wrong with his giving girlfriend this ring.

I would find it touching that it belonged to his grandmother. I on the other hand dont know what she would think. So, Yes, it could be an engagement ring. The bottom line is... will she like it?? and we wont know that until/unless he gives it to her.

Can they honestly talk to each other about the ring and can she say ... Yes I like it... No I'd rather not wear that ring. If she declines the ring, will it make the boyfriend upset with her? My My! You sure did ask a complicated question

My opinion and Bottom Line: I think she would prefer this ring to NO ring... jmo.

[carole]

interesting , i would prefer no ring to a ring i did not like, i would rather wait, maybe get a cubic zirconia in the mean time, some of those are so pretty and look the real thing, many would not know , i got a gorgeous one for my daughters birthday, and was only 30 dollars and it is stunning, so that maybe an option, or go to a second hand dealer and choose one,i guess it is up to them to talk about it and decide what to do, if he wishes to surprise her then he could present her with something like a plastic ring or something funky with a promise to buy her one later, she surely knows the financial situation he is in.

I do feel quite strongly it is not a good idea to give her a ring she has no choice in, but again that is just how i feel and would have felt had my husband given me his mothers, or grandmothers ring, unless of course i had expressed that i loved it, or i actually did.

[Cataholic]

I agree with Carole. Jewelry is so personal, and the feelings of obligation behind this ring could really be awkward. Everyone's feelings would be hurt.

I kind of like the idea of saving up for a simple ring, and not starting the journey of their life on someone else's dime. If there isn't money for a simple ring now, how can they afford the wedding?

[carole]

well i assume the wedding will be a way off,they could perhaps save up for that, or maybe the parents are paying,as it used to be in traditional days, but yes i guess one would ask that question.

[mon]

The ring is beautiful, I think he should give it to her and tell her she can pick her own down the road when they are more financially secure. Two rings are better than one! Bring on the bling, that's right baby

[wolf_Q]

Corby proposed to me with an $8 ring from wal-mart ha ha.....and I wore it for a few months before we picked out the ring I wanted. I'm very glad he did this as I'm quite particular with what I like. I did choose a very simple design - we had it custom made I looked at a bunch of rings and decided what I liked then had a guy make it. He was able to do it for significantly less than the jewelry stores and I love that there isn't another ring exactly like mine somewhere else. So me personally I would much rather pick out my own ring. I don't see the problem in proposing with it and seeing if she likes it but as long as he isn't offended if it's not her personal taste and would like something different....she could still wear the ring and save up to get what she wants down the road.