Hoarders

[Randi]

I've seen some of these programs and they are extreme. It's double sad if animals are involved, like the cats in the program you mentioned, Cassiesmom.

What bríng people to that state, I wonder. My first thought is that they are saving anything they might use at a later point, perhaps because they grew up in a poor family, but that's not the only reason, according to this article:


WHY PEOPLE HOARD.
Sentimental Value. - Decision Making. - Organizing. - Responsibility.
Control/Perfection. - Scared to Forget/Perfectionism. - Letting go of Things.

Simplified Hoarding is about the fear of throwing something away that you might need someday, of not being able to remember it perfectly or that if thrown away it will cause a problem or that something bad may happen.
While many people keep things around them for a variety of reasons, is Hoarding a normal behavior become excessively present, creating more discomfort than it could/should be creating comfort.
Meaning that the accumulation of material goods doesn't create material comfort but will instead result in a discomfort that may disrupt their life on all levels.
How often don't you hear people say:"Typical, just after I finally threw that item away I found a use for it or needed it a few days later.".
But rarely do they end up living in a house where small paths have to be created to be able to walk around.
The following reasons of why people Hoard are all closely linked, but although similar they still have distinct differences.

SENTIMENTAL VALUE.

• Now you would expect for these things that are kept to have a purpose, to be meaningful or valuable.
  But for the person that Hoards, the usefulness and/or value may lay in the most unexpected things.
  Sentimental value is only 1 of the criteria to keep just about anything.
  This value is also about feeling the item is part of "you", not just an independent object.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment I discard of this item I discard a part of myself.

DECISION MAKING.

• The "What If's" that are so typical of OCD are found here too. Those with Hoarding Behavior find it extremely difficult to make decisions, and end up avoiding having to make any by keeping everything.
  "What if I may need this 1 day? Where is the harm in keeping just this 1 extra thing?"
  Not having to make the decision of discarding something literally means that they can't make any mistakes while doing so.
  Sounds simple enough, but how better to avoid making mistakes than to yes, avoid doing things, making decisions.
  You can't do anything wrong if you don't do anything. Those who don't try can't fail.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment I decide to throw something away I may be making the wrong choice.

ORGANIZING.

• There is also the difficulty with knowing how to organize objects, not being able to see how you would possibly store them in a logical fashion (Which is ironic considering the visual chaos that is created by the Hoarder). But while this chaos may be painfully apparent for outsiders, the hoarder himself often finds some logic in this. To him a pile of junk may very well be the only way he can sense some control and order. If only because the pile will literally be created by stacking what is most important on top.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment I am unable to know how to categorize an item, I will place it in sight so I will know where it is.

RESPONSIBILITY.

• As you may see in OCD, you also have a tendency for people to feel Hyper- Responsible for what is happening around them and the people they care for.
  With Hoarding this can result in the accumulation of "Just- In- Case" Objects being carried around with them at all times.
  For me this meant hauling a huge purse around that could easily knock anybody out.
• But you also have the obligation of HAVING to use a certain item. Discarding seems to be wasting something and this is why so many items will later on be categorized under "Recycling", "Giving Away" and so on.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment my object has a use, I have to keep/use it so it doesn't get wasted.

CONTROL/PERFECTION.

• Then you have the issue of Control/Perfectionism, again so present when looking at OCD. The fact that when you throw something away, it's gone and once the trash will be picked up you will never be able to find this item again.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment you decide to throw something away, you no longer are the person in control and what happens to this item will be in the hands of others.

SCARED OF FORGETTING/PERFECTION.

• Because of the fear of forgetting and the inability to accept that we can't be in total control, items will be kept so that with written/printed material for instance, it can be re- read at all times.
  Some will find themselves looking through the garbage, checking if they haven't thrown out something they shouldn't have or resort in writing information down what they see in every- day life, such as license- plate #'s, to make sure the information won't be forgotten. The inability to remember all, becomes the behavior of keeping all within "arm- reach".
  Hoarders have been noted to have a greater sense of Perfection than non- Hoarders and will even expect this Perfection whereas others may strive for Perfection.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment you throw something away, you may forget it's content or the way it looked and it will be gone forever.

LETTING GO OF THINGS.

• 1 other point that for me was a motivation to Hoard was the fear of letting go, of moving on.
  I used to hoard when I was younger, I would keep candy wrappers, elastic bands and small pieces of about..... anything. The idea of loosing things that had even a remotely sentimental value to me, scared me. Because there would be no turning back, no control.
  But to me it also had something to do with things being ephemeral, keeping things or parts of them, meant that I would literally prevent them from ceasing to exist, scared that parts of my life may be forever forgotten. So I picked up small stones, leaves and kept notes and bills. I didn't want to let go of my life and forgot there was still much more to come.
  All part of being afraid of death.
  Letting go of things in life is so needed if we want to experience some sense of freedom, but for someone with OCD this means letting go of the control we want so badly.
  My items became part of who I was, thus letting go would be letting go of myself.
  Today I am still unable to discard or to give away certain items because they are "me", and giving them away would mean part of me would be somewhere else, belong to someone else.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment you throw something away, you let go of that specific part of your life, however insignificant it may be.

[Karen]

They are certainly mentally ill. I do not watch the show because I kinda think it is exploiting these people's obvious mental illness for shock value and TV ratings. It's all very sad.

[Willow Oak]

Until around 2001 or so I basically avoided owning a pet. I liked animals, but as a relatively young man my interests precluded being tied down with the responsibility of caring for another. I knew someone who horded animals -- many scores of them. This person was a relative. I recall visiting and being disturbed about the situation. Alas, I didn't do anything to alleviate the situation, however. I can still see the sad face of a dog eaten up with mites and ticks.

Eventually I did step in, and that is how I came to be the benefactor of as many dogs and cats as I have. Now I am so tied down I can only go to work and home. But I wouldn't have it any other way. I recall once when after I had started rescuing animals that on a certain visit I observed a pen of nearly 20 cats. There was no food. There was no water. I filled a large container with water, and the cats crawled over each other like rats to get a drink. So I set about to rectify that situation. In short, I catnapped all but one of the cats -- about 18, I think. I took all of the cats to the local animal shelter.

I was well acquainted with the shelter and its personnel. They were good people who worked very hard to adopt every animal that came in. Sadly, however, many of their animals were put down. Regarding the cats, I stayed in touch. Since I was always on the lookout for a stray, and pretty regularly came across one, I was a regular at the shelter. A few days after delivering the cats to the shelter, the manager informed me that all of the cats appeared to be in good health, and were very easy to deal with.

To make a long story short, every one of those cats was adopted!

[lizbud]

I've seen some of these programs and they are extreme. It's double sad if animals are involved, like the cats in the program you mentioned, Cassiesmom.

What bríng people to that state, I wonder. My first thought is that they are saving anything they might use at a later point, perhaps because they grew up in a poor family, but that's not the only reason, according to this article:


WHY PEOPLE HOARD.
Sentimental Value. - Decision Making. - Organizing. - Responsibility.
Control/Perfection. - Scared to Forget/Perfectionism. - Letting go of Things.

Simplified Hoarding is about the fear of throwing something away that you might need someday, of not being able to remember it perfectly or that if thrown away it will cause a problem or that something bad may happen.
While many people keep things around them for a variety of reasons, is Hoarding a normal behavior become excessively present, creating more discomfort than it could/should be creating comfort.
Meaning that the accumulation of material goods doesn't create material comfort but will instead result in a discomfort that may disrupt their life on all levels.
How often don't you hear people say:"Typical, just after I finally threw that item away I found a use for it or needed it a few days later.".
But rarely do they end up living in a house where small paths have to be created to be able to walk around.
The following reasons of why people Hoard are all closely linked, but although similar they still have distinct differences.

SENTIMENTAL VALUE.

• Now you would expect for these things that are kept to have a purpose, to be meaningful or valuable.
  But for the person that Hoards, the usefulness and/or value may lay in the most unexpected things.
  Sentimental value is only 1 of the criteria to keep just about anything.
  This value is also about feeling the item is part of "you", not just an independent object.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment I discard of this item I discard a part of myself.

DECISION MAKING.

• The "What If's" that are so typical of OCD are found here too. Those with Hoarding Behavior find it extremely difficult to make decisions, and end up avoiding having to make any by keeping everything.
  "What if I may need this 1 day? Where is the harm in keeping just this 1 extra thing?"
  Not having to make the decision of discarding something literally means that they can't make any mistakes while doing so.
  Sounds simple enough, but how better to avoid making mistakes than to yes, avoid doing things, making decisions.
  You can't do anything wrong if you don't do anything. Those who don't try can't fail.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment I decide to throw something away I may be making the wrong choice.

ORGANIZING.

• There is also the difficulty with knowing how to organize objects, not being able to see how you would possibly store them in a logical fashion (Which is ironic considering the visual chaos that is created by the Hoarder). But while this chaos may be painfully apparent for outsiders, the hoarder himself often finds some logic in this. To him a pile of junk may very well be the only way he can sense some control and order. If only because the pile will literally be created by stacking what is most important on top.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment I am unable to know how to categorize an item, I will place it in sight so I will know where it is.

RESPONSIBILITY.

• As you may see in OCD, you also have a tendency for people to feel Hyper- Responsible for what is happening around them and the people they care for.
  With Hoarding this can result in the accumulation of "Just- In- Case" Objects being carried around with them at all times.
  For me this meant hauling a huge purse around that could easily knock anybody out.
• But you also have the obligation of HAVING to use a certain item. Discarding seems to be wasting something and this is why so many items will later on be categorized under "Recycling", "Giving Away" and so on.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment my object has a use, I have to keep/use it so it doesn't get wasted.

CONTROL/PERFECTION.

• Then you have the issue of Control/Perfectionism, again so present when looking at OCD. The fact that when you throw something away, it's gone and once the trash will be picked up you will never be able to find this item again.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment you decide to throw something away, you no longer are the person in control and what happens to this item will be in the hands of others.

SCARED OF FORGETTING/PERFECTION.

• Because of the fear of forgetting and the inability to accept that we can't be in total control, items will be kept so that with written/printed material for instance, it can be re- read at all times.
  Some will find themselves looking through the garbage, checking if they haven't thrown out something they shouldn't have or resort in writing information down what they see in every- day life, such as license- plate #'s, to make sure the information won't be forgotten. The inability to remember all, becomes the behavior of keeping all within "arm- reach".
  Hoarders have been noted to have a greater sense of Perfection than non- Hoarders and will even expect this Perfection whereas others may strive for Perfection.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment you throw something away, you may forget it's content or the way it looked and it will be gone forever.

LETTING GO OF THINGS.

• 1 other point that for me was a motivation to Hoard was the fear of letting go, of moving on.
  I used to hoard when I was younger, I would keep candy wrappers, elastic bands and small pieces of about..... anything. The idea of loosing things that had even a remotely sentimental value to me, scared me. Because there would be no turning back, no control.
  But to me it also had something to do with things being ephemeral, keeping things or parts of them, meant that I would literally prevent them from ceasing to exist, scared that parts of my life may be forever forgotten. So I picked up small stones, leaves and kept notes and bills. I didn't want to let go of my life and forgot there was still much more to come.
  All part of being afraid of death.
  Letting go of things in life is so needed if we want to experience some sense of freedom, but for someone with OCD this means letting go of the control we want so badly.
  My items became part of who I was, thus letting go would be letting go of myself.
  Today I am still unable to discard or to give away certain items because they are "me", and giving them away would mean part of me would be somewhere else, belong to someone else.
  MISCONCEPTION: The moment you throw something away, you let go of that specific part of your life, however insignificant it may be.

Excellent article Randi. Thanks.

[dehlers43]

To be fair, A&E doesn't just film these people's desperate lives but also chronicles the steps they have taken towards recovery. I just went to their website and they have quite a few links to animal shelters (some of which have animals rescued during the show) and treatment resources. And at least they (and the TLC horders program) are raising awareness of this awful problem. Just watching one episode will make you realize Crazy Uncle Jimmy isn't just "messy" or a slob but that this is a very real mental illness and that there is help, and hope, for these people.

[happylabs]

Wow...I completely forgot I started this thread. I don't think I have watched the show since I posted this back in 2009. I find the older I get, the more upset I get about things like this. That show really made me sad.