I feel like I have to make my mom happy.. while.. I want to make Mike happy too..

[CountryWolf07]

Of course I want more. So does he. But at his own speed. He just takes his time with everything, not just with me, every single thing. For me, when I see what I want, I go for it. I don't wait. He waits. That's the difference between us. Do I notice that he says things about my parents? Yes. Do I notice my parents say things about him? Yes. They just both don't see eye to eye on things. I sense uncomfortable feelings between them. I'm in the middle. My mom says I put myself in the middle, but I don't see how. I am dating him. They are my parents. I suppose I feel torn on how to feel or what to think about when it comes down to that.

[sparks19]

I think you need to have a heart to heart with your mom.

sit down and tell her how it makes you feel when she says things like that. Tell her you are a big girl and she has to let you learn how to be an adult on your own. Maybe down the road it will turn out that Mike is a "mistake" (Not saying he is... just saying in general). Tell her that she has to let you make your own mistakes, otherwise how will you ever learn anything? then I'd probably add in a "besides... if turns out down the road it is a mistake you will get the satisfaction of an 'I told you so' " lol

But really just sit down with her and tell her how much it HURTS you when she says things like that. she's free to have her feelings but she does NOT have to express them and hurt you in the process.

If she presses that it's a mistake then tell her "Ok... but please let me learn this lesson on my own"

[carole]

Sorry you are having these problems, parents always want the best for their children, but i as a mother, take a step back, as long as my child is not being abused or treated badly, i feel if they are happy with their partner that is what is important, i don't remember how old you are? but i think everyone has to live their own lives and make their own mistakes.

I am fortunate that i love my son's fiancee and she is everything i ever wanted for him,but even if she weren't i would respect my son's choice in a partner, i think maybe your parents have to do that to.

By all means discuss this with them both and let them know how uncomfortable you feel being stuck in the middle, and clear the air.

I feel you are probably old enough to make your own choices in life and whatever happens your parents will be there to support you.

Maybe you do want more than is being offered, maybe you do want marriage, children etc, nothing wrong with that, as long as Mike shares those feelings and needs , i think you should be just fine, maybe he is not ready for the whole package just yet, but moving in together and being together five years is certainly a committment. good luck.