Dear both you, my employers,
What did I do to make you dislike me from the start? You've been after me to quit since I was transferred there. All I wanted was (and is still) to do the job right and hopefully to your expectations. I wanted to teach the students. But it seems through your actions and inactions over the last three years that your goal was to get me to leave, not to insure the students' success.
When I asked for your help (after you told me I was doing it wrong), your response was "I don't know, you're the teacher." Sending me on a few professional days doesn't help me in this rather unique program. Why do you change your rules after I've figured them out? Why didn't you teach me your rules instead of telling me the rules while reprimanding for breaking the rules?
You talk about L and L and how to use it with our students. Yet, you apply anger and insults when you deal with me. Do I anger you that much or are you just a hypocrite?
Have you noticed that I make more parent contacts than the other teachers? (Another teacher saw your list and told me.) And many of the End-of-course scores are passing, more for those that have been under my tutelage for a period of time. I'm told by a reliable source that more students have passed the test for me than the previous teachers.
I know that active earning occurs in my class. You wanted me to deliver expert plans, yet keep the students in their seats with a written assignment list to follow. You wanted me to encourage learning and cooperation, yet the students aren't supposed to talk at all.
I tried to talk to you. I tried to present my point of view professionally, and you wrote an official reprimand, much of it lies. I kept my silence and you created more lies. I'm not perfect and sometimes I was wrong. But I did not do all those things and you know it.
You've embarrassed me in my room in front of other teachers and students. I quit showing up after school at the bus line, because you would embarrass me in front of the students and teachers. I just stopped talking altogether, which is what you wanted. That is why your secretary told me I wasn't allowed to talk to another adult unless I was spoken to first. I was told that when I arrived. What a warm welcome.
You can't tell me when I've done right? I caught the girls last year that had got some drugs by your check-in staff. I got the fellow this year that did the same thing. I was doing my job and observing my students. I pointed out that we had a child that was almost shoeless. Another child had vision problems and I alerted the parent. Isn't that what I'm supposed to do? The other teachers know that I have pencils and paper for the students. The students know that if they need supplies for a project, I probably have it. And sometimes they offer to pay for it.
I have to prepare for up to 8 different subjects and can have 8 subjects per class period. I keep my students on task most of the period and the students et me know it too. Still I like them and they like and respect me. I know this because they will do as I need without me asking.
I hope you know what it is that you have done. If you don't pay for it in this lifetime, karma will catch up with you. Perhaps my friends' prayers will find their way to your heart and you can amend your ways. At this point I'm not able to forgive you. Perhaps some day I will.
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