The bulk of my husband's weight is emotional. He's the definition of emotional eater. After having recently eaten a meal with his father and sister, I can completely see why he ate himself happy --- his family is as dysfunctional as they come! We were talking about the weight of my neice who is 10. Sister in law is taking her to a pediatric nutritionist. SIL and I were in complete agreeance on its not a diet, but a way of life. We agreed to never make her feel guilty for eating, or that anything is wrong with her... to teach her to make healthy choices and to learn when to allow herself a treat. I shared the story of my family growing up, and how my grandmom was naturally thin, so she didn't understand how her children and grandchildren struggled. She would anylize everything I ate and compare me to skinny strangers, and I became a closet binger. I told of how I would leave after a short grandmom visit and stop at the bakery and eat 6 donuts while crying as I drove.

My father in law decided that was hoopla and started berate everything everyone had on their plate (never mind the fact that his plate mirrored everyone's) He told hubby that Omar the tent maker must be on vacation (because hubby needs new clothes). I walked out of that meal so very mad. And everyone waas soooo polite and hubby just sat there without standing up for himself or anyone else. I wanted to throw my fork at the man!

He used to call Cindy (the one who recently overdosed) Pudge McGee instead of her real name. He tells my kids to, "Stay skinny and not get fat like your dad." EVERY TIME HER SEES THEM. The girls are both size 8 and very athletic. My son is a walking match stick because he runs marathons on a weekly basis. The man is seriously mean.Yet somehow, nobody is allowed to be mean in return to his comments, nor is anyone allowed to stand up for themselves. Hubby stood up for himself about 6 months ago and the entire family told him to call and appologise - it took 3 months for hubby to finally get the family to forgive him for standing up for himself!

So, as you see, me mentioning weight is taboo. He knows I'm talking, but really hears his dad.

He is working hard on losing weight. At least in his mind, its hard. I am convinced he's in denial about what he eats. He does keep a food journal and thats helped a lot. But he underestimates how much fat/calories he's consumed in a single meal. So yes, you could say, "all I had was a hamburger." But was it a single hamburger or one of those Red Robin type burgers loaded with junk? The same could be said for salad. Just because you ate chicken on a bed of lettuce doesn't necessarily mean it was healthy once you add a cup of dressing, a ton of cheese, croutons, etc. But I know from my own experience I can not measure what he eats or tell him not to. I have put my foot down regarding soda. I found his stash of empty Coke bottles the other day. I made a joke of it, but I did remind him that its the one thing he promised the doctor he'd cut out.

He is also getting all the testing done to have gastic bypass type surgery. It'll be sometime during the summer (hopefully) but htey won't do it if he can not demonstrate that he has the ability to lose weight on his own. Then he also needs to lose weight so that he will be able to safely undergo surgery. The odd thing is, that at his weight ALL his tests come back beautifully. His sugar levels? Perfect. Cholesterol? Could be better. Heart? All channels clear.

As for walking with me? I try. He can't go more than two blocks. I take him to stores with me just to get him out and walking. He has to push the cart for support, and I can't be in the store more than 15 minutes before his back cramps up and he has to sit. I took him to the carpet store yesterday - I'm getting FREE CARPET!!! - and he could only look for ten minutes before finding a seat. I made him come to me every time I found something instead of enabling him to sit the entire time.

Whew - I wrote a book. Sorry